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POET'S HANDS

These are hardly poet's hands
far too scarred and gnarled with age
with skin as dry as desert sands
yet they still scribble on this page

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
I have come to find out that I'm not the first to use the label "Rhyku" in describing a particular form of poetry. since the other poet's use precedes mine I'm going to delete my use of Rhyku in describing this form.........stan PS there are absolutely no hard feelings between me and the other poet, this is just the right thing to do
Editing stage: 

Comments

I haven't seen a rhyku before. You've donw a good job - does there have to be a syllable count? I see it rhymes is that another feature? It's good to read your work

Thanks for sharing Stan.

Love Mand xxxxxxx

P.s typo ( I think ). should it be = far too scarred "and" gnarled with age?

Rhyku: a rhyming Haiku. Rules are pretty simple. 1.minimum of 3 lines, maximum of 4. 2.at least 2 lines must rhyme,doesn't matter which 2. 3. no line can contain more than seven words. I came up with this form to allow those who prefer rhyme an outlet to write in a defined compact form with more freedom than allowed in many Japanese styles. Hope to see you give it a try.................stan

author comment

Thanks Stan! kind of you to explain that to me.

Love Mand xxxx

Stan, I think rhykus are your forte, (as well as stories like your *Careless Bird*)

~A

I DO tend toward narrative poetry I guess. And often need a fort to hide behind lol.......stan

author comment

lol.

however, to folks such as myself, perhaps there's a tendency to circle around the fort, playing cowgirls and what-have-yous.

~A

cowboys and Native American Indigenus Inhabitants doesn't have quite the same ring does it?

author comment

Check reply to mand above as to style. I made it pretty simple in rules to make it easier to use. You should give it a shot............stan

author comment

I liked everything about it as it spoke about you and I liked the scribbled on the page part. Good job there Stan. I am liking your new writes and see you are experiencing with them. Keep up the good works my friend

Mona
xox

I came up with this on old site where I tried a Haiku and was informed rhyming was not allowed in Haiku. Also thought it might be a good way to post a write consisting of very short form. I know there are many times I come up with a great 1st verse then hit a brick wall. This is also a good way to decrease "orphaned " unfinished writes...............stan

author comment

Now I know what a Rhyku is too,
I have mostly studied the Haïku
as they are so beautifully concise,
like one petal falling into my lap.

But I enjoyed yours here. Thank you. Love Ann

"The image of yourself which you see in a mirror Is dead,
but the reflection of the moon on water, lives." Kenzan.

Thank you and I'm glad you liked this...............stan

author comment

you definitely have a poet's hands... it is obvious from all your works!

*hugs, Cat

"The Book of Styx" can be ordered and purchased on line at:
http://eddystyx.mythramuse.com/

I count all the scars on these hands and not a single one came from a pen lol. (perhaps that should tell me something about career choice.......appreciate your visit.........stan

author comment
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