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writing poetry for lovers

youth is tough for dreamers
i write that
intending it
to be all i say

but you remember things
little ones
shallots are spring onions
and it leaves me
you listened

there should be
something more profound
than just outlines of myself
more to run your hands across

more lasting than
whatever 'this' is

and there again is
a reason to make you
into poetry

so 'this' is remembered
by the poet

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
[This option has been removed]
Last few words: 
I hate the title lol
Editing stage: 


I am tempted to be unorthodox here as a friend of someone's mother was out with her boyfriend and had eaten a large does of onions, that proved fatal when she was just about to kiss him, she let off a fart and the lover ran away.

Your message is infinitely more delicately put Chez!

"The image of yourself which you see in a mirror Is dead,
but the reflection of the moon on water, lives." Kenzan.

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