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Band of Fools...

The twilight sky is adorned with a gaggle of drunken geese.
Their vee-formation discarded, they race in a swarm,
boisterously honking, the coming of Spring.

I imagine them having one for the road.
Flying high...
Announcing their arrival.

The crows in the naked branches of the old oak look up,
snickering in low tones of amusement.
The sparrows just shake their heads, and settle in.

Ready for the banquet, taking the best room at the lake,
and lolling on the beach.
The boys are back in town...

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
I was in the yard, with the dog, and heard the geese before I could see them. I thought that they sounded rather loud and rowdy, and when they came into view from behind the neighbor's house, I saw that they were not flying in the usual vee-formation, but in a loose mob, as though they were racing each other, like a bunch of bikers headed for a party. Funny, but I never saw that before. I have seen them switch positions in the formation, as they tire and drop back, but never as just an unruly gang. Anyone know if there is something that would make geese drunk? ~ Gee
Editing stage: 

Comments

I have never heard of drunk geese before! I've heard of other drunk animals, such as a peach-drunk sow in the peach orchard, from eating fermented fruit. I saw my first geese of the year this past saturday. They were standing on the last of the ice on my girlfriends pond. My favorite lines are:

The crows in the naked branches of the old oak look up,
snickering in low tones of amusement.
The sparrows just shake their heads, and settle in.

Ready for the banquet, taking the best room at the lake,
and lolling on the beach.
The boys are back in town...

Loved this one! Great title, too!

love, Cat

When you fling poo, some of the stink sticks to you!

"The Book of Styx" can be ordered and purchased on line at:
http://eddystyx.mythramuse.com/

I have never heard of drunken geese before either, but it sure looked and sounded like they were! I was stuck for a title, but then thought about how they were acting. We have had a problem at a local park and swimming pond the last few years, the geese have taken the place over. Kinda like a bunch of bad-assed bikers. Chasing the swimmers, loud parties, and just being a nuisance. Thanks for the read and comment, ~ Love ya, Gee

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Fear i would think, i've saw them chased and caught by a fox. Boy do they make a noise as they scatter. I've also saw them as they arrive at our pound, and they're landings are all over the place while honking. Your poem describes they're arrival perfectly, i can see the Crows and Sparrows while i read. Nothing i can see to critique. Regards Roscoe...

Roscoe Llane,

Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.

always make everone aware that they are here. They chase the swimmers and last year the town hired a couple of guys with dogs to chase them, but they came right back within minutes, everytime the dogs left. LOL. Kinda like bad boy bikers swooping in right after the sherrif goes fishing. Thanks for the read.~ Gee

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Lovely poem, I enjoyed watching the geese as they landed "boisterously honking", arriving and asserting their presents on the lake, "The boys are back in town". The crows snicker and the sparrows shake their heads as
if to say "here they are again".

I can see nothing to critque either.

Thanks for sharing Geezer

Love Mand xxxxxx

I had replied to your comment, but I don't see one here. I'm sorry, maybe didn't. At any rate, I am glad you got the picture. I am an avid bird and animal watcher, and can tell the sparrows were particulary unimpressed. Thanks for reading and enjoying, ~ Love ya, Geezer

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the sparseness was inspired by the fact that the sun was going down, and it was getting a little chilly outside. LOL. Yes, I guess it might be a little different, my perspective on certain things is somewhat askew, [not necessarily a bad thing]. Just different lately. i'd love to hear that story! Geese are funny things to begin with, I think a drunken goose must be a real riot! Thanks for the read and comment. Love and higgest bugs, ~ Gee

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I have seen birds drunk on fermented berries, but never drunken geese. I really love this poem and consider it one of your best.......................scribbler

A nature lover like yourself, I consider that a real compliment! The scene of those geese, strongly suggested that they were drunk. They were definately not in any kind of formation, and they were flying full-tilt across the sky, honking madly! Thanks much for the comments and the read. ~ Gee

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i loved the build up from verse to verse creating the refreshing mood of spring...

raj (sublime_ocean)

I enjoyed the way you put in words how spring is brought in. I think it is a wonderful piece. I enjoyed feeling the spring air rushing thru to me for my pleasure by my computer. Great job once again!!!

Friends,

Pixee

I love nature, and all the animals. The way they respond to the changes in the seasons, has always fascinated me. I am so glad that you enjoyed this. ~ Gee

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I apreciate the read and comment. ~ Geezer

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I guess it could be applied to the situation of having a night out on the town. LOL But, it really was about the geese. I had a night out with the boys last month, and we went to one of our favorite watering holes, [back in town], got drunk, did some serious honking, [Kareoke], and in general hadf a good time. I must have hit the right notes with this one, because everyone likes the same lines! Thanks, ~ Gee

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