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Lovesick

.
the twirling of the night sky
while dancing looking up
the whirling of the stirring
when drinking from a cup

the fuzzy head from spinning
when I was a child
or staring for too long
into a spinning spiral

as I look into your eyes
those feeling come on quick
dizziness
queeziness
think I'm gonna be sick

Comments

I enjoyed reading this: particularly the comparison you brought out in your description of being in love.

Not sure why you entered this under "Blog" rather than a "poem'', because it reads pretty much like a poem to me.

Reminded me of the old song: Windmills of your mind by Petula Clarke ("Like a circle in a spiral, like a wheel within a wheel...")

A few minor typos you may want to consider cleaning up:
when drinking FROM a cup
or STARING for TOO long

Psyve

thanks...now that you mentioned it, it does remind me also of Windmills of your Mind especially in the metrics of the lines, let alone the spining, whirling, spiraling stuff. Good ear Psyve. this of course was unintentional on my part!
and shall not fret about it...as for posting as a blog, I think it has to do with the one poem per day rule. I should check the date of my last poem posting before choosing "blog" or "Stream"
thanks for catching the typos

Al

author comment

I enjoyed this poem on falling in love. I liked these lines best:

as I look into your eyes
those feeling come on quick
dizziness
queeziness
think I'm gonna be sick

Suggestion: Enter these as poems and you will get more responses, as a lot of people don't read blogs.

Always, Cat

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