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On A Homeless Man's Death
A homeless man lay dying
On a bleak and wintry day
People purposely avoided him
As if he was in their way
God’s angels watched in wonder
Surely, someone would care
To help this fellow human
But, they only acted unaware
He had helped a threatened woman
He fought to save her life
And the man that tried to harm her
Attacked the homeless man with his knife
People kept on walking
As tears fell down his face
The life poured from inside him
As he prayed for dying grace
Dear Lord, I tried to save her
I think she got away
Be near me as I die, Lord
Help me Lord, I pray
I’m ready Lord, to meet you
My life’s been filled with strife
I have no home to go to
I’ve had a painful life
I’ve been to Vietnam, Lord
My soul is sad and scarred
And living on the street
Is lonely, cold, and hard
Most people, they reject me
They do not understand
And when I leave this street, Lord
Please hold me in your Hands
Then, The Lord said:
My son, I understand you
I never had a home
I was rejected by my people
I was killed by my very own
I know the pain you’ve gone through
I see that no one cares
People can be greedy
Some don’t like to share
That’s why I came to get you
On this bleak and wintry day
I know your heart’s been lonely
I hear you when you pray
I wanted to make sure
They knew how much you cared
That’s why I chose you, son
To save the life I spared
Now come home, my dear child
Your soul is finally free
I’ve been waiting for you
You’ll spend eternity with me
catherine m howell 4 ~ 2010
Last few words:
I wrote this after hearing the events of this poem, on the news. It disturbed me that people on the street did not help this fellow human and if I remember correctly, some even photographed this dying man:(
Things are not always as they seem.
Editing stage:
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Comments
themoonman
Sat, 2011-02-26 14:35
Wolfy ...
A sad story indeed, sadder that it is at least somewhat
based on truth. I enjoyed the read and was moved by it,
despite the simple rhyming and the not quite there rhythm,
but a simple count of syllables could help with that.
thanks for posting, it does deliver as is.
Richard
scribbler
Sat, 2011-02-26 19:57
greetings
coincidence that I'm working on a poem about people being more than just what they seem. A few ideas that may help rhyme :
L-3 change purposely to on purpose ( seems to sound better when read aloud)
L-10 try Fighting to save her life ( avoids close repeat of He)
L-12 try stabbed the hero with his knife
*should find synonym for Lord to avoid over use
L-24 having had a painful life
L-27 and living on uncaring streets
L-30 try nobody understands 9helps rhyme in L-32)
2nd part
L-6 try I see there's none who care
L-50 tell scribbler to kiss off
just some ideas which I hope to be of use...................scribbler
Candlewitch
Sun, 2011-02-27 17:37
Dear Catherine,
I cried while reading this. I love that it was written in two parts. A very sad and emotional write. I have no suggestions. You moved me deeply with your observations and concern. A damned fine write!
love, Cat
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