Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Poppet
Maliciousness falls in a toxic seasoning
upon fragile head of little poppet whose
untainted effigy freshly picked simmers
in a stew of negligence.
Violence delivered upon her pallid flesh
harshly decreed by the loathsome giants,
whose barbaric stride crush her body
beneath putrid ocher feet.
The reek of long festering decay drops ominously
from these ogres' damaged brains. Eyes blank,
jaws clenching teeth, and fists balled in unwelcome
approach, the nightmarish realities lurch forward ...
Destruction their agenda.
copyright©2010Kristina Russell
5, August 2010
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words:
This is another old work submitted prior to the crash. Once I've recompiled I will begin to submit new works. To those of you who have read this and the old ones to follow I apologize and for any new readers thanks for reading and any critique you may have. Regards, Mistress Obi Wan ( Katplath) Feb. 2011
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
weirdelf
Mon, 2011-02-21 19:28
Needs redemption
Fight back! These people are weak in themseles to abuse someone so. Tell them so.
Use harsh, violent vengeful language if it helps,
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
weirdelf
Tue, 2011-02-22 10:19
Oh, I fogot to mention
brilliant use of language.I just read all your poems and you are brilliant!
but I say again, fight back, He is the weak person, you are the survivor.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry