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Because There Is No Laughter

Because there is no laughter
in the morning,
the flowers wake up late
or not at all,
my milk is sour
and all the bread is stale.

My smiles are only memories,
I wear a rainy day,
my crown's a thick gray cloud
and my spirit is the cold.

My pain is like the evening light,
beautiful, tragic
and crimson everywhere,
another still-born poem.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
I'm having problems with the title. Any good ideas?
Editing stage: 

Comments

thanks for the lovely imagery poem. Nicely done..

Alid

You're welcome :)

No verse is free for the man who wants to do a good job. - TS Eliot

http://www.wsgeorge.com/

author comment

Liked to read the similes used by you to relate various moods. A nice crisp poem, a pleasure to read it as almost always is the experience while reading your posts...

Regards,

raj (sublime_ocean)

Thanks Raj

No verse is free for the man who wants to do a good job. - TS Eliot

http://www.wsgeorge.com/

author comment

William I felt like a cloak of sorrow was being draped around me as I read your poem,

This is a cracking good poem, I don't have anything to suggest

I will say, Bravo :)

love JC xxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

Thanks for liking this. It was sadness that I had been reflecting on.

.

No verse is free for the man who wants to do a good job. - TS Eliot

http://www.wsgeorge.com/

author comment
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