Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

TRIPLE-TWO-THREE-ONE-OH

TRIPLE-TWO-THREE-ONE-OH

We take long walks quite regular,
We sit around and chat-
But, since you boys are dying to know,
There ain’t nothing lovey-dovey
You know, we’re really not like that!
(But that girl is mighty good for my ego…)

And then, that night for all confessions:
I am- you are- the only one…
Did you know “Blue Jeans” were tailor made for you?
And, you seemed so sure
When you said you loved me more
And more and more than anyone before…

The six-bump-bit, the shoulder-fit,
A darkened auditor-
Oh please, Cy, can’t we try once more?
I was a mite embarrassed when
You promptly kissed me there and then-
(All the others found the movie quite a bore…)

Oh, that night for all confessions:
I am- you are- the only one…
Did you know “Blue Jeans” were tailor made for you?
And you seemed so sure
When you said you loved me more
And more and more than anyone before…

Well, yes, maybe once you loved me
You say now, but that was so long ago!
You say you can’t remember each and every fall…
So, by small and empty gestures
You do try deny it all:
Which is why I know it hurts, when you recall…

Oh, that night for all confessions:
I am- you are- the only one…
Did you know “Blue Jeans” were tailor made for you?
And, you seemed so sure
When you said you loved me more
And more and more than anyone before…
.
.
.
.

If you'd like to hear the song version, simply click on the link below:
http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=7078857.
.
.
.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

and listen to this live! This is something I really liked, because it does indeed remind me of the kind of music I listened to in my youth. Dylan, Joplin, etc. You have one of those reedy voices that seems to get a purchase on your attention, and climb right into your head, through your ear. Great stuff ~ Gee

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thank you for stopping by to listen and comment.

I am pleased you liked the sung version.

"Dylan and Cohen and Bobby McGee:
Two-Day-High, you sure were like me" goes the line in another of my songs ("Two Day High"), so I guess we listened to pretty similar music, when we were both younger.

Cheers

Psyve

author comment

The poet emerged sometime between these songs.

What a time, and we hardly knew....

~Anna

One day I will understand all of your comments.

:-)

Till then, I'll have to guess at your meaning from time to time...

Hope you liked this one....

P

author comment

Hahaha.

But I'm an open hymn book and a Psyve song. ;-)

~A

hi , after reading this and then seeing the link I
just had to go and listen , I am very impressed
as my own preference to music would be Neil young
I love his music and enjoyed yours very much .
I'm a real young fan , seen him three times
over here in Ireland
in the above lyrics, the last stanza is my own favourite
but it all sounds great you have quite a talent
I'm so glad I came to your page ,,,,,,,,zigs

I salute anyone who breaks the rules in the interest of art and great poetry writing just as much as I admire poets who craft meter and verse within the confines of good grammar. Walk the tight rope or jump from it and see if you can fly.

Thank you for listening to this. Am glad you enjoyed it.

I too have been a fan of Neil Young's for a long time now...since the early 70's.

I recall the immense pleasure I felt, when as a college fresher back in '75, a senior student showed me the correct chord sequence / fingerwork for "The Needle and the Damage Done" .

Back then online song chords were unheard of , and I had, till then, been working with a poor approximation, namely: D, C, G , B-Flat, C, F, E-7, E... which had never felt QUITE right.

Thank you for that memory!

P{syve

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.