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Silicon Rebirth
From space to void
from womb to bed
from thought to soft
mewling cry.
I wait in queues
nuzzling long teats
of soft warm fleshy
motherboard.
site searches
reveal myself to
myself, growing
changing.
Reaching with eyes,
shitting voracious
words into napkin
white pages.
I spoke first words
monosyllables like
Manna and Amma.
Then fell reinvented
cyber-born from the
electronic womb,
cerebral plasticity
remolded.
Umbilicus lank
cortex extended
I draw sustenance
within this silicone
computerus.
My mewl, my cry
a new language,
beyond dark binary
conjugations.
you watch me as
I watch you both
Reborn.
Editing stage:
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Comments
Geremia
Mon, 2013-12-30 09:49
You are no Esker,
You are no Esker,
billypringle
Mon, 2013-12-30 10:52
No I'm not that good that's for certain...
But this is not an esker rip off unlike yours which are generic rhyming poems of the romance languages...
JImm
Rula
Mon, 2013-12-30 10:50
Are you sure
Manna and Amma are monosyllabic words?
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billypringle
Mon, 2013-12-30 10:54
You tell me...
Do double consonants form a syllable ? Do single vowels form a syllable - find and bring me the evidence. But neither of you have critiqued the poem. both may I add seem rather reluctant to do so . is that because you don't understand it?
Jimm
Rula
Mon, 2013-12-30 11:04
here is one
You check the other. You are a native speaker of the language,aren't you?
http://www.webster-dictionary.org/definition/manna
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billypringle
Mon, 2013-12-30 11:13
not the word i used
sorry no breakdown into syllables there.
Jimm
Rula
Mon, 2013-12-30 11:31
it's so clear
each vowel makes a syllable, so /Man-na/ and /Am-ma/
there's nothing wrong in admitting mistakes. We learn new things daily, don't we?
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billypringle
Mon, 2013-12-30 13:05
not as the howl of a new born
Perfectly obvious.
Jimm
Rula
Mon, 2013-12-30 11:22
the message
of how we create a poem with the use of the search engines and then transfare it through the net is obvious. May be you'd like to take it to a deeper level. Just a suggestion unless I have missed something here.
Computerus? a typo?
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Ian.T
Mon, 2013-12-30 12:15
Rula
Sorry I looked up that silly word Computerus, you are quite right about those two words having two syllables each.
But as usual Jimm will only throw abuse at anyone that dares correct him.
I think that he is due to be shown the EXIT from Neopoet site He contributes nothing, I have been trying to get an answer about this but it is taking too long.
There is NO excuse he has broken the main rules or directives of Neopoet and should be told to go before he causes more damage, just wait till he sees this, I will await to see which toys he throws at me LOL
Take care young Lady, Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Ian.T
Mon, 2013-12-30 11:56
Jimm
The theme is quite a good one but needs an edit to let it flow better
Manna and Amma these equal 2+1+2= 5 syllables
http://www.poetrysoup.com/haiku_syllable_counter/
Computerus
Strategically placing an overheated laptop over one's uterus to ease menstrual cramp.
If you stopped downing our poets all the time, you may learn something about words, this is a place to learn so use it correctly.
I also notice that you have just called Mand a shallow bat..
It is about time you either left, or grew up
Maybe you operate from a laptop I see
you have found another use for it,
as your word computerus indicates,
Yours Yenti
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
billypringle
Mon, 2013-12-30 17:04
As for that blind bat
As for her , i see one of your grieving nutters told me to F off. Is that worse or better of more acceptable that blind bat ? Which is it? She called me a troll which the last time I saw meant a dwarf from the Scandinavian subcontinent.
kudos
Jimm
billypringle
Mon, 2013-12-30 17:05
Not buying into this is ...
Not my problem. A neologism is rare in poetry or any writing - they are usually coined by people in a field of study such as psychology or modern research such as brain activity this word was coined by me by combining the two rather obvious words computer and uterus the combined meaning of the words is obvious. In this case it was coined to serve as a vehicle for the effect computers are having on our brains, something well researched and published by neuroscientists who in spite of their realization that the computer was giving rise to a new form of human brain failed to see the obvious - so I coined it for them. it may , to a total ignoramus, incapable of lateral or even shallow thinking seem ridiculous but your point of view is from just that , ignorance. as for the syllables in the two words Amma and Manna they are meant as new words again my coinage words uttered by the new man that emerges from the long term interaction of man and machine - hence the title Silicon rebirth which in spite of being at the top of the poem no one seems to have looked at closely and put two and two together to understand the poem for what it is. It is the first poem to my knowledge that takes the latest information on cyber technology's effect on the biology of the human mind. This is the birth cry of a new human being - one born of silicon and software.
Just a cursory reflection on your lives will reveal that interaction but there again your too busy being stupid, silly , indulgent, angry and vindictive as well as bad poets to realize that.
Now are you going to critique the poem or not or are you going to maintain your pathetic owl arsed atitudes all the while and remain as gimlet mouthed as ever?
Jimm
scribbler
Mon, 2013-12-30 18:58
goodbye
Mr. Pringle
Ian.T
Mon, 2013-12-30 19:17
Stan
I hope this is really goodbye to Mr Pringle, if so thank you for your work in addressing the situation, I am just so sorry it had to take so long,
Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..