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the sadness of being

the mourning light
lays upon your face
spilling its sadness
wearing your grief

we hold on trying
to halt your slide
under our hands
leaves of skin flake
to float the breeze,
you are vanishing

smile lines are erased
a flawless mask
takes their place,
looking into the unknown
you are lost in dreams

each day a knife of anguish
carves at your mind
you've forgotten
the majesty of life
and a love all carry for you

suffering and misery
stay behind in attendance
we touch your center
hoping to revive a spirit
to no avail

he would have wanted you
dancing to the music of each day
finding joy in a speck of light
to love again and deeply
with passion and flames

happiness was his mantel
a laughing song of joy
and a soul overflowing
with hope,
he was your everything,
we can’t begin to understand

But,
your presence is missing
we have lost you both,
I have cast spells
and woven magic
to bring you back

I have prayed to a god
I don’t believe in,
with no answer,
now
I am lost to your sorrow
I will join you in black
until you are ready
to come back to being again

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

Not one of my favourite pieces from you, but these things happen and seem endless, thrashing around searching, blaming, trying to come to a reason.
All in the moment of grief, yet to find that in the true light they are but a thought away.
This seemed like two poems interwoven, there needs to be a positive link between the two, take care young lady and there is plenty of time to write,
Yours as always, Ian x

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Sorry you didn't like it, this is a really rough edit I didn't do a lot of work on this one I planned to work on it here I will be posting my edit for it tomorrow night see what you think. The moments of grief can be crippling for some people unfortunately for my friend its really taken a toll she is in a really dark place at the moment and its such a shame, I know and hope she will come back to life, she just needs to do it in her own time I guess

thanks for the read and the comment its much appreciated

love always JC xxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

I have read this several times and it took a while to feel the loss
of not one, but the second in the process of grief.
Sometimes when the black is worn it covers the outside and inside at the same time.
We just have to stand back a little and let the healing in and at the same time give total support to the second person.
A hard poem to write and I didn't go into it as I usually do sorry, it is Good, Yours Ian.T xx

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

I been working all day on edits I plan to finish a couple off tomorrow and update them over the next few days this is one of them, sometimes the theme is expressed well enough and maybe in this case I didn't do my job, I am halfway through a very hard edit its a hard thing to put into words, someone else's grief is a hard thing to describe, what you see on the outside is not all there is, is there ?

You have nothing to be sorry for I have read poems in the past and totally missed the point or conclusion

thanks for your return visit I hope you like what I have done with it when I update

love always JC xxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

There's a desperation here that I really, really love, that horrible pit-in-the stomach wrench of inevitability that all of us have felt, facing the imminent death of someone we love.
Most excellent.

Respectfully, Race

"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo

There is a kind of desperation trying to bring her back from the pit of despair its been an awful time for her, sometimes the only real healer is time isn't it ?, she's slowly doing more so that's a great news for us

most excellent ? will do me big smile

I hope your health is behaving itself and the family are all well, I will be having a look later to see if you have posted anything recently I am not on everyday but I am trying to make more time for myself and my writing I have a project I'm working on I would love to get finished so I am taking more 'me' time to write

take care my friend with much love JC xxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment

Beautifully expressed! There are so many wonderfully stanza's. This is truly heartfelt and deep. I Love the last two lines!

Your heart is on your sleeve.

Love Mand xxxx

I am very happy you liked this one I plan to play with it some over the weekend I think it can be improved.
Ah my heart is always on my sleeve, I cant help wondering sometimes if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

thanks for your visit and the read its much appreciated

love and hugs JC xxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

author comment
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