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Man, A King Of The Cats

A man who pissed you off so bold
Shopping is like sparkling gold
Glittering in the smile of a rose
When feelings of affection are revived.

I stay within financial means
But sometimes I get so steamed
Without retail therapy to tame my meanness
My submission is in jeopardy.

If I could turn back the hands of times
I may revise words that caused your demised
But then you'd still be the same old guy
I wish I could choke some sense into

A gentle lil pussy
Becomes a fierce cat

Editing stage: 

Comments

Made me smile. He he This poem is very relatable and very cleverly written. Love the second stanza especially the last two lines.

Very well done! I like this poem a lot
Love Mand xxxxxx

Glad you like it

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

author comment

A man can pissed you off so bold [bad grammar maybe who instead of can]
That shopping is like sparkling gold
Glittering in the smile of a rose
When feelings of affection is revived. [grammar again are revived]

I stay within financial means
But sometimes I get so steamed
Without retail therapy to tame my meanness
My submission is in jeopardy.

If I could turn back the hands of times
I'd revised words that caused your demised [?]
[I would revise the words that caused your demise]
But then you'd still be the same old guy
I wish I could choke some sense into

A gentle lil pussy
Becomes a fierce cat

Now to the meaning of the poem. From your body of work I know you are in an abusive relationship, so who becomes the pussy and who the firece cat?

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Pussies can become fierce cats when cornered if it sees no way out. Otherwise stay a pussy.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

author comment

Rawwwr grrl!

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

A thorn in my flesh. I try though by revising several times before submitting.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

author comment

I like the meaning and the comparison of a,woman scorned or fed up to a cat...docile until pushed to the limits...than look out! Great write

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

I'm glad the cats description worked.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

author comment
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