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fairy tales

Submitted by MDT on Tue, 2013-07-30 17:40

what is love
but a deceitful game
of exposure
and contamination
of the pure self
to compromise and exchange
for an image
that is not you
essential soul
now dispersed
among those
that once were loved
with truth and trust
enthralled in lust
longing to share
a beating heart
with another
to dance in fairytales
but fairy tales are but tales
lies and betrayals
that offer only a temporal
experience of so called
love.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
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How does this theme appeal to you?
Editing stage: 
Editing - polished draft

Comments

Rula

Wed, 2013-07-31 06:39

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A tender read. Looks like it comes after a bitter love experience or betrayal. It is sad though
to see someone hurt but I believe writing sometimes helps to let go some of the bad feelings.

Have you considered lineation.

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Ian.T

Wed, 2013-07-31 11:42

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I think that you must separate the truth from the fairy tales.
The truth of broken loves and life as it carries on is fine, you just have to deal with that side.
Now to Fairy tales, they are as important as any code of living, they have lasted for more years than any written truths of love and hate.
They remain as they are for all time, I love to walk on a butterflies wings, talk to the Dragons of old.
There are so many things that live in other dimensions that we can only wonder at that we think of these things then so they are..
Conclusion:-
Separate the two they belong to totally different places in the scheme of things. I had to smile that you could bring the fairies into a broken love.
May the fairies of the mind fly around your thoughts to bring you a calm, it will come they are very forgiving lol..
Take care out there it is a puzzling place to be, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

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