Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
o p i o d i c i t y
atrocities of flood
awash in ivory
hued and broken
the beams
Our slate endowment
written
beneath the fury
of the pain
depths driven
like finger lights
rivened
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
Esker
Tue, 2013-07-09 14:53
Been critiqued for liking the late eighteen hundreds
boom towns and post edwardian
the noveau...
the love of the crown opium
and the orient trade...
lonlyhrtsclub13
Tue, 2013-07-09 15:40
The depths of pain
are unmeasurable. I like the comparison to a flood and how it washes away, leaving things broken and a mess. Emotional pain is much like that. It becomes overwhelming leaving one's soul and mind broken and often messy. I really enjoy how your poems make me think and how creative your titles are. Thank you :)
Keep Writing,
Carrie
"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"
Esker
Wed, 2013-07-10 14:39
Search Engines...(hate them) I crank out titles to baffle..
Simplicity is wonderful and meaning and all..
but I lived in complex emotional fluxes
"mess and breakage.."
yes carrie....
lonlyhrtsclub13
Wed, 2013-07-10 15:04
yes Steven
I too have lived in a complex emotional flux most of my life and now dealing with my son's emotional hell...I have been.creating titles and using synonyms to replace my original idea...purely experimental
Keep Writing,
Carrie
"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"
Esker
Mon, 2013-07-22 16:37
fluid extension of thought
our ideas coded and overwhelmning
falling like a tendered rain
our shadows leaning stretched
thin as we hold onto the meaning
ever more.....
lonlyhrtsclub13
Tue, 2013-07-23 08:31
the meaning
the meaning of love
we have our own
what it means to us
it doesnt to some
would like to hear it
if someone meant it
those three words
Keep Writing,
Carrie
"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"
Esker
Tue, 2013-07-23 12:50
labyrinth of mirror
Love....
what is it..
full of its pain
ambition and tears.....
lonlyhrtsclub13
Tue, 2013-07-23 12:56
wipe away
your tears
release your fears
hold you close
in my heart
take a chance
do the dance
crimson lips
pressed to yours
Keep Writing,
Carrie
"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"
Esker
Tue, 2013-07-23 13:05
its depthy and narcotic fullfillments
as a drug
a shoal
beneath a goal star
burning close
like a firebrand
lonlyhrtsclub13
Tue, 2013-07-23 13:12
addictive
wanting more
taste of sweat
mixed with sin
keep coming back
again
Keep Writing,
Carrie
"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"
Ian.T
Wed, 2013-07-24 03:05
Both
I wonder if there is a quiet space somewhere that lets love breed.
A place where two can be as one rythme. one sound and one mind.
I have found that this elusive word and it's actions belong to a place that touches us, not one that we can reach out for.
I hope that you both in your own ways can be touched by that love thing wherever it is and whatever it is.
I need perspective lol, Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
lonlyhrtsclub13
Wed, 2013-07-24 06:24
Ian
There is love everywhere....sometimes in unexpected places...we just have to search
Keep Writing,
Carrie
"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"
Ian.T
Wed, 2013-07-24 09:30
Carrie
I didn't look for it at all,
but it just hit me,
then I had to leave it behind.
Life is like that LOL,
Yours Ian.T
PS:- what's that smell? it may be life, I have left behind!!
Take care
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
lonlyhrtsclub13
Wed, 2013-07-24 09:42
Ian
Some people are lucky and love finds them, I seem to have to work a little harder and it still bites me in the ass....
Keep Writing,
Carrie
"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"
Esker
Wed, 2013-07-24 14:04
Ow.......!
the sting of the search....
nothing is as nothing is....
but I am old enough to have worn
this through
this search
I am looking for other searchs
and letting what may arrive
..
I seem to find a more resolution
this way then an expectation
or ideal build on fleeting ghosts
and visions
lonlyhrtsclub13
Wed, 2013-07-24 14:53
the search...
has worn me out
time and time again
i came to realize
i am not the one
for anyone
just one of the ones
til they find someone new
Keep Writing,
Carrie
"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"
Esker
Thu, 2013-07-25 16:43
Find someone new....
I dont accept this for me Carrie...
put up with it ...Like tarring a leak from the ceiling..
But I hear you!
I know you want to be the ONE
feel the arms about you for YOU
shit I want this..
and looked for this for years..
and learned about substitution..
how I was secondary
and providing for all
now Im not anymore
No Im first and now all
those whom treated me
second are arriving
and changing their tune
I am the bandleader
the LION TAMER now
shit what a job..
is that what I wanted
someone to be bent this
far to appreciate me in
this manner
I am looking beyond this
and accepting of much
how many marriages and
businesses are based on
such simple strata of beauty
and trust...
I am into a new realm
in writing and relationship\
and finding it!!!
the new key that turns the lock
in the door to much more
exciting mystery!
step aside those fearful
I am ready to bound through
and find the treasure....
Grrrrr!
lonlyhrtsclub13
Thu, 2013-07-25 17:06
excitement
Something I used to feel
Sometimes it comes back
When someone sees there
Is more to me than what
Is on the outside
I often wonder
How to get rid
Of the ghosts
That haunt me
Glad to see you
Are leaving yours behind
I find you most intriguing
Keep Writing,
Carrie
"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"
Esker
Fri, 2013-07-26 12:39
I am a lifer.....
I thought about offering all this up and leaving
but I love all the routes..the positions
the rumble in the jungle
the hilltop positions
and starfeild ache....
somewhere along the way I went native
and fell in love with it all....
Perhaps my love of Atwood and Conrad
and Milton and Sexton changed me
I hear you about being heard
and believe me I read and see
the creative venue you offer here
we are travellers
on our unit missions
coming in from the feild
survivors counting tallies
and packing up for
more....
who else is going to write
to feel to emote
I am here...
dug in
...
lonlyhrtsclub13
Fri, 2013-07-26 13:23
i am forever
here
I left it all behind
stayed away
for almost three years
came back to find
that i dont really
have much talent
I just write what
i feel
in real life
i say very little
express my emotions
even less
this is my outlet
my sanity
my only resource
Keep Writing,
Carrie
"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"
Esker
Sat, 2013-07-27 12:42
Like waking up
that moment caught in the torn characters of the dream
still in character putting on my shirt my jeans my shirt
filling pockets while my brain elevates into life through
all that most cant remain in and whom and where
some live through and are....the mind a most vast
and mysterious place.....Like poets and sites...
I am on another site and write more there
as have been since 2004.........I found and find
neo a place to come and leave what I write rather
then sit in physical form on typewriter where I merely
threw all that writing away until two oh four.....great
thing about cyber is that one can just keep filling up
the idea of "space"
the expressionism I like here
Persona I am just going back to re look at these
days......how mine changes in different mannerisms
but in the end I myself confess that Neopoet
has indeed helped me hook into a creative world
like the art classes of high school
and one or two months in college
where I sat with the poor and wealth
discussing opionions
most of my poetry is direct result of what I am
doing in life or have done...crafted into fiction
of course.....nothing verbatim
I like your writing...your comments very much
I like the voice you have here
and our discussions
we do mean something
we have a voice
we are poets
we are creative souls
and we do make
a more imaginative place
in the ordinary
thats the gift
many have this skill
and merely just file
it away because of
the present business
of running life
the fact that this is
a landscape a gathering
a creative place
is amazing
intimate and social
the new age of
persona
and passion
of course
I am also very passionate
about this place and
its writers..
Thank You!
wesley snow
Sat, 2013-07-27 14:11
Wish I could say something pithy.
I didn't get this the first read, but even if I never understood anything you write the language still would amaze me. Too bad you don't much care for rhyme.
W. H. Snow
A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley
Learn how, teach others.
The NeoPoet Mentor Program
http://www.neopoet.com/mentor/about
Esker
Mon, 2013-07-29 10:59
Wes..after reading Milton I knew I could never touch..
the geniuse of his mind from then....some years hence
"Brave Eucydius" or something like it..
Like now when I am compressed and find it hard
crushed by the weight of life and my ghosts...
when everything is clear....when the cage door
is raised I am in pathos...
I know you want to see how I do with the rhyme
I shall consider this and ponder it.
Thank You!