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human ala perfection
there is undoubtedly nothing perfect
in human strife….
be it living with a girlfriend
or a lovely wife….
all seek perfection in a boy friend ….
hardly one anyone can find….
yet we all must keep perfection in mind…
and
strive to be the best that we can be….
let the rivers of perfection flow….
the aromas of roses blow…
and
as we trudge along the vast loneliness ….
in the universe ….
lets compose poetry terse …
and
keep the imagination far behind….
as we all should seek,
as much love …
as perfection we all have …
in our noble mind.
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
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Comments
Ian.T
Thu, 2013-07-11 04:01
Loved
One of your better pieces for a while,
I can't fault the theme and the whole thing reads well..
I think someone will say lose the and's between the Stanzas
as they may not be needed.
But it is optional, Take care young Bard,
Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
loved
Thu, 2013-07-11 10:31
shall
if some one else reads also
then
and ......
will/may go
loved
Ian.T
Thu, 2013-07-11 19:03
Loved
I have put some darkish pieces on stream about Digit and his first two forays into the night of hate for him, would like your opinion as I don't write these very often as they are not on my shopping list lol,
Take care young Bard,
Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
loved
Thu, 2013-07-11 21:01
shall
I u so wish
I am hardly a critque
loved