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Doing it right

I don’t understand decoration

When I ride a wave I ride for the tube,
Not three sixties

When I ski, I ski fast,
Through powder, bumps, trees or avalanche

If I designed a building it would be a cube,
Or hexagonal for maximum density

Is there a paradox here?
Not to me.

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Comments

but trees is the same as woods,

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

Sounds very much like you, do you need that "S" on the end of avalanche as it sounds more crisp without it.
Seems that you won't take second place, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

well sspotted ssir

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

beauty, truth, simplicity, need no ornamentation...the vapid, ugly, and superficial hide in it. (can you blame them!)

your poem is an exemplar of this point, and particularly apropos of poetry.

Al

It's probably a good thing I'm not an architect though,
[grins]

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment

This is so You and 98 % of the men . I think women can take care :P

I thought in line one
I don’t understand decoration

might be "stand" instead of "understand" but both work.

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

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of a male/female divide over the subject of decoration. I remember, I think, criticising one of your poems for using ~~~ etc. And I certainly don't like centred verse.

Understand is the correct word. I can appreciate decoration when it doesn't interfere with the prime function of the object/work/piece etc.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

author comment
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