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Pillowed Dreams
while some
are ambitious
with dreams
to achieve,
I have mine pillowed
though I often could
hear them murmuring
"believe"
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Editing stage:
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Comments
Josephus
Mon, 2013-04-15 06:48
A beautifully succinct poem
A beautifully succinct poem but not lacking in imagery for all its brevity.
Joe
My mind's writing cheques my body can't cash.
Josephus
Mon, 2013-04-15 06:48
A beautifully succinct poem
A beautifully succinct poem but not lacking in imagery for all its brevity.
Joe
My mind's writing cheques my body can't cash.
Rula
Thu, 2013-05-16 15:49
hi joe
Sorry for the belated reply.
Very much appreciate the comment. Thank you
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wesley snow
Tue, 2013-04-16 23:32
Beau's right.
Although the "English language is as the English speaking people speak it" (or write it ), technically "got" is not a word. There is never a reason to use it unless a character is speaking in a dialect that would use it. "Have" will always suffice.
Sweet poem Rula.
W. H. Snow
A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley
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Rula
Wed, 2013-04-17 00:21
Thanks sir
English-excuse me- is a bit weird language, don't you think so?
Any learner would think that a word is a word as long as it is listed in the dictionary and is heard of the TV .
Ah! I learn something new everyday and the road is still long.:)
Thanks for the visit.
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wesley snow
Thu, 2013-04-18 13:50
English.
"I" before "e" except after "c".... weird.
W. H. Snow
A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley
Learn how, teach others.
The NeoPoet Mentor Program
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Rula
Thu, 2013-04-18 16:49
at least
this is a rule we learned a while ago
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Ian.T
Tue, 2013-04-16 04:16
Rula
As with Beau this is a very good piece..
When at school, in English, they would always say that, got, get and the plurals of the same, were weed words, and should be avoided as their English is not good..
I await others to confirm this as it was a long time ago, lol,
Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
Rula
Tue, 2013-04-16 11:24
Thanks all
For reading and for the helpful thoughts.I've edited accordingly
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loved
Thu, 2013-04-18 15:38
stick to your gun
let others have fun
loved
Rula
Thu, 2013-05-16 15:52
hi loved
Always appreciate your comment.thank you dear
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nokros
Wed, 2013-04-24 12:28
You don't
pen like a rookie - impressive lines.
Rula
Thu, 2013-05-16 15:51
hi nokros
And many thanks for your lovely comment
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