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Winter on The Prairie

Submitted by Race_9togo on Wed, 2012-12-12 03:38

Sometimes,
on the frozen edges of old night,
I sit upon the back-door steps,
flakes of snow still wandering through
the yellow glow of back-porch light,
and in the frost-breathed dark,
dusted by a swath of watchful stars
crowding close around the house,
I hear winter's whispering wind
through the leafless snowbound oaks,
and it brings back memories of the sea
a thousand miles of lifetime away.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
This is an attempt to re-write the only poem I didn't save from the old site.
Editing stage: 
Not actively editing

Comments

sueb

Wed, 2012-12-12 05:15

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I was there with you closed my eyes and imagined myself on the steps lovely poem x

Race_9togo

Wed, 2012-12-12 15:22

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Glad that you enjoyed sitting with me!

Respectfully, Race

"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo

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Rula

Wed, 2012-12-12 11:39

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captured jim
Nothing to critique

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Race_9togo

Wed, 2012-12-12 15:23

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Thank you for your enjoyment!

Respectfully, Race

"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo

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weirdelf

Wed, 2012-12-12 12:58

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But I guess I had to be there.

Maybe not. The smell of cheap teacher's tea, cigarettes, books and teacher sweat still invokes my first love. We were both often standing outside the teachers staffroom for... well, in modern terms "sexually inappropriate behaviour". We were 10. [grins]

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Race_9togo

Wed, 2012-12-12 15:24

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Thanks Jess.

Respectfully, Race

"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo

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scribbler

Wed, 2012-12-12 17:51

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You capture it all perfectly..............wish I lived where one could see stars while it snowed....................stan

Race_9togo

Wed, 2012-12-12 18:10

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Where I live we have lake effect snow, where the warm moist air from Lake Michigan gets pushed inland, and the sudden drop in temperature makes it snow like hell. One minute there's complete cloud cover and blizzard conditions,then in the next, when the wind shifts, you can see the stars. We often get conditions where the snow is blowing in from the North, but the sky above is clear.
If you're on the street you can actually see it, a curtain of white that moves back and forth across the dark street; one side clear, the other a whiteout.

Glad you liked this one.

Respectfully, Race

"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo

author comment

scribbler

Wed, 2012-12-12 23:56

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Should have known better than to think it was a mistake lol. I reckon if a type of weather is possible it exists Somewhere..................stan

Seren

Sat, 2012-12-15 05:19

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You took me there sitting on the back doorstep, something I do quite often here ... I would love to sit in the winter and feel the atmosphere you describe so well :)

nicely done bravo

with love JC

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

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