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Drones

Drones

I sit here at my computer
with my flight controller on
Don't worry my child
This wont take long

I fly my Drone,
across deserts sun blazed,
seeing with its eyes,
a man standing amazed.

He stand's with no fear,
just does't realise.
Never seeing me,
a drone flies, his demise

In my room so far away,
"Yes" I will kill him today.
Maybe take out a family or two
It matters not to me, or you.

Some electronic message,
told me what I had to do.
I hope you didn't suffer
My job, is to just kill you.

I never ask for anything,
having a new game to play.
Who next I wonder?
Tomorrow is another day

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
How does this theme appeal to you?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
I have watched these killing soul less machines, flying across others lands, controlled by someone in a far off land. Did they take some teenager, and tell him it was a new game where he would receive a message as to his next mission. It will never stop until civilisation catches up with technology. I am going to get a bit of flack but this is not humon. Let our leaders stand there face to face and fight hand to hand then how long will the weapons be changed into Plough shears. It's not even Sunday
Editing stage: 

Comments

you are getting the hang of freeform meter.
A powerful poem. Drones are insidiously evil.
In war men kill men, it's absolutely wrong, but it the man feels the death of another, he feels it.. Not some military trained geek with a joystick.

One of the best poems of yours I have read.

I have gotten out of the habit of critiquing form lately (there are a few I could pick on here) but there has been a major change in my life view and content counts for more than anything else to me now.

Bloody well done, my friend.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Thanks for dropping in also the good critique, I am so glad that there is a little modernism creeping in, where form is sometimes and I say SOMETIMES as important as the theme.
I am so glad that things are moving on a little for you and take care of what you really feel, there are many ways of looking , just choose the best it is sometimes better for the heart.
As always, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

author comment

thank god for the test sites what allow "us"
Canada too! to perfect a more humane way of
removing Evil

I believe in a strong offensive force in this time
Years ago Ghengis Khan had this
and was completely mobilized and portable
Even large cities with stores archers and walls
succumbed to this great military leader
He fell from illness and an inner sickness with
his hierarchy
Inbreeding of thought does more to kill the most
strongest of systems

(that is why one must breed carefully and selectively
to achieve a strong superior system)

anyway I am glad for Grooms Lake and Area 51 and
the brave intelligent men and women who assist the
men and women on the ground who volunteer to keep
a stronger presence in this world
Today the dertermined have hardy assault rifles
and human beings willing to sacrifice their life on suicide
missions to blow up men women and children buying
goods to feed their family of a new dvd
Tommorrow they may buy the cruise missles
or enslave or empower en masse
a structre capable of owning the deserts the ports
where America and others need the precious fuel
to fill their SUV s and sports cars Aircraft for
vacations in the caribean (its beautiful down there)

Canada alone cannot feed the great artery
the threat is there
they have drawn blood
from a long history of violence from the bible days
back

The organized and careful application of air might
with intelligent weapons will eliminate further the
need to risk the men and women of America
and Canada into a firefight

But a great poem on the other side Ian
and they do just drive to work and then eat lunch
and come home

its a tough job
but so is being a soldier and killing known one
may be blown up

I will not be going over there to pick up an AK
any day soon though

Thank You for the poem on this valiant struggle though

The great overlords speak, and for the kings shilling the troops will die.
We all know that my yacht on the Riviera is paid for by the suffering of those that have only a shilling to spend.
Is there a system in this world that can rectify all this waste.
The waste of young lives and technology that could make the world a paradise.
Maybe we will never regain that paradise again, the snakes name was probably greed or any of the seven sins what ever.
The Great Bear will just shake his head and say that there is peace within if only we could all feel it, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

author comment

Great topic Ian with plenty of food for thought. I doubt
very seriously if the drones are flown from individual's
homes but with technology today, it could be done. I've
heard some disturbing news reports recently about the
use of drones killing innocent women and children but are
they any worse than a missile lobbed from a ship at sea,
the act of war has never been pretty or fair, it would be good
if people could talk instead ...

thanks Ian, you've rattled my brain this morning !!!

I suppose since the invention of anything that you could throw to kill or shoot the actual thing about killing someone else, eye to eye left us in a state of a type of indifference that what we do has moved away from reality no matter how real it is.
If the one that drops the bomb or fires the weapon could only be a part of the end product, and actually feel the pain and suffering they cause, there would be very little bomb throwing, but we know this is not so.
The games that we give children to play now in front of a box where reality has no place is the same as modern warfare.
I can on the Computer press a key and kill someone and they can get up again to rerun the same game.
In real life they cannot get up again what a sad game we play in the world.
In this UK we have Trident Submarines what the hell for now to say that they are a deterrent is stupid, against whom..
We send young lads as you do to Afghanistan have we not learnt a thing in the last 40 years or more.
The French could not win in Vietnam yet you tried and lost many men, the might of Russia went into Afghanistan and were beaten by a load of tribesmen with home made weapons, yet we turn around and send our young men in there to die.
I bet you that within the next few years there will not be a single Troop from us or you there and things will not change, our loses are around 450 and the States it is around 2000 or more, when will we learn.
And it is not even Sunday maybe I can use the Jewish Sabbath to get on my soapbox lol
Thanks for your read and comment, kit's so good to let a few things out,
Yours Ian.T
PS:- Have we won any wars since WW2 I can't think of one.
Oh! the Falklands I think we did and only lost 255 troops, but that was for Oil. Now Germany runs Europe did we really win????

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

author comment

or climate controlled rooms
and probably have special dark roast coffee
in the lunch room

they dont have to wear traditional garb
lug the heavy as shit rifle and ammo
skulk about for a good shot
and cant be making food or farming for
their family when they are working at
fighting

sad all the way around
though

war is the shits

most likely "clean" rooms to keep their equipment
in peak running order, sad thing is it's a technology
that almost anyone can master, hell, it's a remote
controlled airplane.

scary times we are in

Thanks for your input, while I was in South Africa late 90's I had to make 25 half containers into air conditioned offices that would be totally mobile in that they were put onto trucks and sent where ever.
I wonder if they are used for some nasty purpose now.
Damn history why can't we get our heads out of our asses and start to use our skills in making this world a paradise.
Sadly not in my time young Steve, I like the idea about the Coffee though, I like Kenya coffee fresh ground, none of your cat shit stuff.
I like to know its picked dried, roasted, and ground, not rejected as a food source. LOL.
I shall leave this world in the sate it was when I arrived, 1942 -
There was a war going on when I arrived Nothing changes that is the way of man.
I will join you in the lodge of the Spirit when I am asked, meanwhile I shall try my best for all around me, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

author comment

In my opinion drones probably Decrease the number of innocents killed and are thus more humane. For I remember carpet bombing large areas in popukated towns in attempts to get a single target. Also anybody who associates with these terrorists who incite others to intentionally target civilians might want to be looking over their shoulders (or up in the sky) and decide if such association is worth their life. I know I much prefer the use of drones to kill our enemies over shedding even one more drop of American blood in the fight against the new barbarians......................stan PS very thought provoking poem

Yep I suppose Drones and other remote killing machines save lives, I don't have to put on my flack vest and watch out for IED's or whatever the name for those man made mines are.
I have watched the Coffins come off of the aircraft at Lyneham many times over the years, gone are the days when Tommy was buried where he fell with his hat stuck on an upturned rifle.
My Uncle, bless his heart is left in a plot of land in Jerusalem, it is this time of the year that he is remembered most Jesse James Howard one of seven brothers that fought in WW1 my Father was born 3rd Dec 1897
sounds strange, he ran away to join his six Brothers three times as he was the youngest of them all, just a little young to join, on the third time they took him in.
He spent a lot of time in Egypt never spoke about the war it must have been bad for them, in a war to end all wars???
Thanks for your thoughts on this one it was written after seeing a man at a consul and a Drone going across the desert well the rest is easy to write, Maybe I shall rewrite one day to make a better piece..
Thanks again great to have you all walk with me, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

author comment

The way you bring us into the poem does not reinforce the vacant and detatched murderous emotion we are left with at the end. Sitting at your computer lets us know you are about to partake in an activity and then in a linear fashion you guide us to its end. But I see an opportunity here to blindside new readers a bit. I would set the stage for innocent "game" playing in the intro so that perhaps the reader fills in the gaps with thier own imagination. Perhaps they think at first you are playing the sims, or a even a first person shooter. Then you create an impact as they slowly realize your murderous game. Just a thought.

-godshouldnthave

I saw those drones again last night flying over Gaza, now I don't side with either of the combatants but where did the lazer guided bombs come from and the Drones that are looking at the ground with that appetite for war.
The State of Israel did not produce those drones or the lazer weapons, the rest of the world seems hell bent on keeping Israel in power, well why don't they educate the Palestinians and give them aid, and Stop Israel grabbing more land.
I blame us the UK for making the State of Israel in the first place, we are so forgiving that in the early days of the state they would hang our troops out on the street, but that's a kind of war, and is all forgotten.
How can a place that only has milk and honey be so aggressive and be so looked after by such super powers as the USA????
Not my problem, but there is always an excuse not a solution..
Thanks for your read and comment I think I have drifted a bit lol
This piece was written in about 10 minutes as most of my short pieces, yes it needs a little more thought.
I bracketed the whole action with the children at play or waiting to play with their Father.
This is reality but not quite as I have written it, we teach our children to fight this type of war without thought to the end product it would make a shattering Poem, feel free to use the theme and see what you come up with.
Here we should put a theme out and ask for poems around it to see how different thoughts on one theme can make dozens of poems.
Take care and thanks again, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

author comment
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