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I taste the air
around my lungs,
reaching for divinity

a lone sparrow
that carries
a sacred missive,
in a perfect language

words that spoken together
stir hearts as one,
bringing all
to a place of knowledge
immovable
but traveling fathoms,
only ever touching
on the profound
never

(too much too soon)

Augurs will pronounce
peace to multitudes,
as in the opened wings
of a dove,
the first scribe of truth
lets one feather fall

the first contact
in the language
of the birds
was pure silence
that marked the depths

trilling a passage
to peace

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

I liked the sonics of this, maybe some lines could be combined so shorter lines have more effect. "Travelling fathoms' sounds great and connects to 'depths' but seemed out of place as the dominant images are of birds.
Some lovely interweaving of images and ideas. Particularly liked the ending.

regards
ross

I am going to be away till monday so I will take a copy with me and see what I can make of it, yout right about the fathoms line, i really would like to keep that line somehow .... thanks for the comment and crit its much appreciated

love JC xxx

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

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