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Oneness, interrupted.

Growing weary of talking
at the end of the night
we fall into each other
loosing our grip
on the boundaries of Self
We begin to merge
becoming One

Then, she stirs
with a wriggle and
a trump
wakes with a smile

We laugh,
Our Oneness interrupted

Editing stage: 

Comments

"interruptus" might be funnier. cool plot theme!
I like this poem's lightness

Al

Thanks Al :) glad the light heartedness came across, will give the 'interruptus' thing some thought, can see it might add to the humour, thanks again, much love Beki xxx

'God turns you from one feeling to another
and teaches by means of opposites,
so that you will have two wings to fly,
not one.' (...Rumi)

author comment

Hey lovely, glad you liked it :) sure you can remember what it's like lol glad you're going to have a little break, rest up beautiful I'll be thinking of you, sending love and healing. Love you too, hugs back beki xxx

'God turns you from one feeling to another
and teaches by means of opposites,
so that you will have two wings to fly,
not one.' (...Rumi)

author comment

First, it's wonderful to see you. Love the poem, *Oneness interrupted*, how apt a description for many things, including Neopoet's crash, eh?

Big Hug.

~

Wonderful to see you too Anna :) So glad you enjoyed the poem, and yes very apt eh? I only wish I had more time to dwell here in Neoland :) hope you're well. BIG love to you dear lady xxx

'God turns you from one feeling to another
and teaches by means of opposites,
so that you will have two wings to fly,
not one.' (...Rumi)

author comment

the 1st 7 lines are such a good description of familiar love that they could stand alone as a poem themselves.........scribbler

Thanks scribbler :) glad you think the first bit could stand alone, I feel the little twist gives the poem a different edge and is definitely a reflection of my reality at the moment lol. much love Beki xxx

'God turns you from one feeling to another
and teaches by means of opposites,
so that you will have two wings to fly,
not one.' (...Rumi)

author comment

I have been going through your posted works with growing admiration.
Your poems are short but touch a chord.... in several people, by the looks of it.

I enjoyed this little poem too. Every young parent will have experienced this particular... interruption.

Well written.

I am becoming a fan.

Psyve

ooooOOOooo a fan lol :) seriously, I'm touched you've gone through my posted works, good job tis a new Neo, it would have taken you ages on the old site ;) I haven't reposted any old stuff, these are all recent writes. I'm happy my writing touches a chord in you, I tend to write my life, a lot lol and I guess we all have similar experiences and emotions :) especially where parenting is concerned :) I hope to have time soon to repay the visit :) Thank You for your encouraging comments, I really appreciate them, much love Beki xxx

'God turns you from one feeling to another
and teaches by means of opposites,
so that you will have two wings to fly,
not one.' (...Rumi)

author comment

You're welcome.

I am a songwriter myself and find that most of my work springs from my own experiences too....

If you do get round to looking at my work you will find a link to the recorded sung version of each, just under the lyric.

Cheers,

Psyve

I love this poem, no changes needed that i can see. Regards Roscoe...

Roscoe Llane,

Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.

Thank You Roscoe :) happy you enjoyed this one, much love Beki xxx

'God turns you from one feeling to another
and teaches by means of opposites,
so that you will have two wings to fly,
not one.' (...Rumi)

author comment
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