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Southern Breezes--updated

SOUTHERN BREEZES

southern charm and southern comfort

southern breezes and southern spices

scorching days and sultry waves

of cotton dresses

satin sheets in perfumed nights

passion’s fire seething into daylight.

Editing stage: 

Comments

This is a style of poetry I have never been able to produce. The sort of "travelogue" poem of simply stated imagery of a locale or person. You do it well.
wesley

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

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You can do just as well. Google the term EKPHRASIS IN POETRY--there's your answer.You have great command of language.

Thanks,

Joe

author comment

Thank you Joe. I'm off. wesley

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

Learn how, teach others.
The NeoPoet Mentor Program
http://www.neopoet.com/mentor/about

I am always sohappy to see y,ou Ian. Been ckose to my end twice this past month but am managing qujte well now.

"southern comfort" is a play on words--it is also the name of a whiskey.

author comment

Thank you, Ian. Would like to hear from someone I know.

joe

author comment

that's good poetry.

This is going to sound niggly. but I want some 's' sounds in the last line. More in the way of assonance than alliteration. It would prosodically enhance the poem, I believe.
maybe something like
passion’s fire searing till sunlight.
or
sensuality bright sustained till sunlight.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Will do.

author comment

Does it feel better to you too?

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Oh, yes, Very much. Thanks.

Joe

author comment

The poem now to me has a sense of the sussuration of Southern breezes heating up to a congruent yet impacting ending.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Yup. Now.ya'll come and visit some time, hear now? [typical Southern, "cheers."]

joe

author comment

have anything to do with an ugly old cantankerous poet like me?
I suspect not, and will live with your poetry instead.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Don't underestimate yourself. :)

Joe

author comment

all be it, the appalachians, and I feel you captured the "down home" ole timey feeling quite well.

Thank you. I remember the South in the Jacksonville of the 40's. {See BLACK WIDOW - true story]. I miss it.

Joe

author comment

Nice collaboration Joe & Jess.

South & North, interesting the divesting of principles, the South with it's facade of *gentility* and the North with its prevailing explosion of *myths*.

However, I like your poem, Joe. To hold someone in love, anywhere......

~Anna

Right on target, my Anna.

author comment
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