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Rhyming Workshop
This Workshop is a joy to employ
So don't be coy, consider your ploy
To profit from rhyme experience
Getting fatter has never been better
Filled with inner poetic meter
Bulging rhyme skills, bloating knowledge
The 2011 Oktoberfest Carolina Princess, happy
My pageant baby, excited, given a penny
She added to her calculate piggy's many
Just as, contented poets, delighted
Write great poetry, enlighten
By leaders more than excited
They shine bright, shimmer in the rhyme workshop
Partakers comment, critique and learn from each other
Attain caring leadership from all leaders,
Come together as community of friends at Neopoet
Give back to new members, beginners, advanced poets alike
Filled a love to read, review, poetry of others
Not just write, post, everything ever written
Input, time, talent, possess
Whether natural, scholarly, or skill, blessing cherished
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words:
Writing this way I hope to get much of the exercises in. Not an easy task to remember
Was written on my iPad notepad. May correct formatting later if I remember or get time
Editing stage:
Workshop:
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Author information
Region & Country
United States
Favorite Poets
Billy Collins, Shakespeare, Emily Dickinson, Whitman, Jess Tapper
Comments
weirdelf
Thu, 2011-10-27 20:13
finishing, not finished
see if you can give Barbara some suggestions on this, I'll come back later.
Oh and I need final critique and suggestions on the workshop itself at
http://new.neopoet.com/workshop/rhyme-use-variations-and-forms
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Barbara Writes
Sat, 2011-10-29 01:51
Ok I i have revised it better
appreciate your views on the rhymes you noticed
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community
author commentweirdelf
Fri, 2011-10-28 11:59
the first two stanzas use
strong rhyme, weak rhyme and assonance
the third has two double rhymes
the fourth has two near triple rhymes!
bloody well done!
The fifth falls into the gerund trap! -ing is too easy and should be avoided but beautiful assonance!
The sixth and seventh I feel you lose your way a bit but of course, you needed to finish the poem.
I've thought about this a lot and have to ask, in light of the grammatical differences you often use, does your African American accent change the meter and rhyme much? Please understand, I'm not being racist here, only ignorant and the same as asking Rosi about differences in rhyme with the Scottish accent.
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry
Barbara Writes
Sat, 2011-10-29 01:49
Feel free to ask anything Jess:)
im not that serious about myself or race. :) My own race react the same as you do. i don't know if it's African American accent changing meter and rhyme. I tend to think not though. I do knw I'm just different in a irritating way as an alien from some other world trying to fit in.
I appreciate honesty because it affords me understanding in what I'm doing that is out of the norm and I will attempt to realign and adjust my way of doing things.
*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.
Neopoet Community
author commentweirdelf
Sat, 2011-10-29 04:27
heaven forfend you ever become normal Barbara!
No-one else here is! [grins]
cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry