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life in grays and black!
In the solitude of blindness, you have found resolve. Choosing to see life in grays and black!
Your resolution a legacy in monochrome
Simply your eyes only see pain in the archives of your heart. However, before this pain there was bliss, the sublime kaleidoscope of trust and love
In this solitude of blindness what will your truth become!
Monotonous, because you can’t see forgiveness as this is also a color of love.
Will you see life with clarity pass the grays and black transforming equations into new reasoning resolving your trust without limits of meaning
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage:
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Comments
CCfire
Wed, 2011-07-13 07:02
It is almost a question for
It is almost a question for the readers, I thought the beginning was particularly strong but it faded a little in strength in that last paragraph stanza, it's very poetic prose rather than poetry and slightly cliched at the end, I feel with a little more energy at the end you could end this on one of those moments a reader will go 'wow' Nice to read a new person again on here, seems more are posting which is good to see :)
Chez
"The perfect woman perpetrates literature as she does a small sin: as an experiment, in passing, to see if anybody notices it - and to makes sure that somebody does." - Nietzsche
press
Fri, 2011-07-15 20:29
life
Teacher what can I say only that I am evolving slowly but surely in to the finite ways of writing poetry
But I must say I strive to find my own style and this must start by writing these pieces in my own structure for now
But your help & love to me seem to be continuous and you will always be a part of my history
Lov2u press
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