Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
WE MARRIED HIM
One man, one wife,
The ideal thing to do
Laws made to protect
Support the weak in love
Bigamy, polygamy and polyandry
For reasons diverse and varied
Though outlawed in the mores
Hold sway in forms and guises
The man with ninety nine wives
Ha! That’s just too much for one
His children known by names
And to each, a number given
Some credos egg on more than one
With conditions to love them equally
Be it for economy or strength in numbers
The fighting cock protects his harem
Yesterday, new conditions arose
When war finished our men
A ratio of ten to one applies
For the few left behind
One man, one wife, so defaced
Men, like hot cake, rushed at
Must we then marry our sons?
Queried our women in judgment
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
User login
Author information
Favorite Poets
Inspired by an article in an old manuscript, It reads:, AXIOMS OF PERFECTION, In the physical order – In the realization of the dream of beauty, In the moral order – In the realization of the dream of love, In the intellectual order – In the realization of dream of poetry, In the spiritual order – In the realization of the dream of the mystics
Comments
t. reflexion
Wed, 2011-06-22 14:51
It is a shame...
that you don't get it. My aversion to negative tendency as you have demonstrated should be clear to you by now. Either you don't know the difference between English Literature and Literature in English or your nature is on the dark side. You should not mix issues here, you either make your comments on a piece of work as an entity that exist distinctly or you leave it. When you leave a piece of work and attack the author, that is beyond your scope. What I think or believe in, is not your business. You have just shown how narrow your world is. Let me tell you, if you have nothing positive to say, then stay off my scribbles.
A rekindled faith - Dancing in the Light
author commentloved
Wed, 2011-06-22 11:43
sex is for free
take it from me
but one has to give in
willingly ,
not only will one happy be
in a soliloquy
lonely .............
twill lust alone be
maybe
loved
t. reflexion
Wed, 2011-06-22 15:29
Yes,
It is free, here, this piece is only a reflection of the situation in Sierra Leone and Liberia after the war. Thanks for the comment and best wishes.
tr
A rekindled faith - Dancing in the Light
author commentscribbler
Wed, 2011-06-22 12:08
hello
They say the Morman tendency toward polygamy began because so many of their men had been killed.........scribbler
t. reflexion
Wed, 2011-06-22 15:33
My friend...
you got it, hitting the nail on the head, thanks for the time and for the comments. Best wishes.
tr
A rekindled faith - Dancing in the Light
author commentt. reflexion
Thu, 2011-06-23 05:10
Ian.T
Thank you very much for your guidance. I have posted some works on the old neopoet site that may pass for some of these and I am also trying my hand on some at moment, they are not ripe for posting. May be I should post again those poems or scribbles, as I call them, on the new neopoet stream. The truth is, it is not that easy for me, thinking and reasoning in one language and writing out that thought in another language, it has its challenges. I may not have the equivalent of a word in the other language or in translating, I loose the flow and rhythm. Also, I don't consider my vocabulary in English rich enough to give me an easy sail, especially on rhyme scheme. I may start with an idea, but in trying to obey the rules and conform to norms, I end up with something else and that which inspired to write is lost. In spite of the limitations, I am undaunted, I will continue to write, may be one day I will excel or remain an example of man who wanted to be a poet. In all, I appreciate your support and the audience you give me. May you continue to increase in knowledge and wisdom so that your good nature will reach more people in need of improvement So mote it be.
tr
A rekindled faith - Dancing in the Light
author comment