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BACK PORCH DAWN
Stars have faded in the eastern sky
as the horizon bleaches black to gray
Carolina bids the night goodbye
and prepares for yet another day
A barred owl silently glides past
to his daytime secret sylvan home
June sunrise is coming fast
acrobatic squirrels start to roam
Mist streamers lift from the still pond
like last night's departing ghost
where cat tails wave like a magic wand
crane touches down silent, almost
Neighbor's cat stalks an old mocking bird
I smile, he hasn't got a chance
his pounce and miss leaves him perturbed
doves start to coo from pine tree branch
I smell coffee brew and eggs fry
just as a rabbit hops into the clover
a car door slams, I turn and sigh
the magic peace of dawn is over
Style / type:
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage:
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Comments
faithmairee
Tue, 2011-06-21 23:47
Hi Stan
Very creative and full of lively imagery. Great title and subject...Nice work, Stan.
Love,
Faith
There must be a poem in here somewhere.
scribbler
Wed, 2011-06-22 08:51
hello Faith
I am always pleased to see you have visited...........stan
Eduardo Cruz
Wed, 2011-06-22 00:12
Stan
What a great write, very Norman Rockwell.
Eddie
LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS
IT'S ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO DANCE IN THE RAIN.
VIVIAN GREENE
scribbler
Wed, 2011-06-22 08:53
hi Eddie
You know me, ol' writes what he sees lol...........stan
scribbler
Wed, 2011-06-22 08:55
hello Theo
I had already considered the secret hidden line and will correct the redundancy soon. Wonder why spell check didn't catch the cat tails thing? Thanks for the eagle eye............stan