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STORM BITS

Summer days, moisture's haze,thrunder brays,lightning's laze

          sun goes,thunderhead grows,windows close, wildlife knows

                   hard wind,trees bend, warnings send,picnic's end

                                 puoring rain,loud refrain,hail's pain

                                           river's gain. house shakes

                                                           bough breaks

                                                               drowns snakes

                                                                 knee quakes

                                                                       rains slack

                                                                            clouds wrack

                                                                                 blue crack

                                                                                      sun's back

                                                           cool blows,run-off flows,storm goes,rainbows

                                                                                

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
Just another write transferred from old site. An example of "concrete" or "form" poetry
Editing stage: 

Comments

Haste makes mistakes lol.Will correct.........................stan

author comment

Loved the rhyming and I am not one for straight forward rhyming. But the picture you formed with the words was great. It put the finishing touch on the power of the storm. Been a while since I have seen someone do this, loved it.

Kim
(V)

Rottie
Pegasus was a genius,
living within a suit of difference.
He liked what he was,
nodded in respect and
simply flew . . . away.

By: K. Mulroney

" I am who I am, say what I say, do what I do. With no apology."

It started out a a straight vertical line of pairs of rhyming words. Did not like the way it looked, so I changed form and accidentally fell into form poetry lol. Been trying to do one on purpose ever since...............scribbler

author comment

See what happens when you're looking the other way? lol! It worked out perfectly.

Rottie
Pegasus was a genius,
living within a suit of difference.
He liked what he was,
nodded in respect and
simply flew . . . away.

By: K. Mulroney

" I am who I am, say what I say, do what I do. With no apology."

You can be fairly confident if I do something right it is probably by accident lol..........scribbler

author comment

pour and creative poetry galore

loved

thank you
for review..............stan

author comment

yes, the picture is much clearer without double spacing..........stan

author comment

When I originally posted this I was told it is called either concrete or form poetry. A poem in which words are arranged so as to form a picture of what poem or at least part of poem is about. I have seen a nonet here a few weeks ago and will likely try one before too much longer.............stan PS I guess that makes this a none nonet lol

author comment

Glad to have accidentally been of help lol............stan

author comment

If it helps, the only time I'm any good it is by pure accident........................stan

author comment
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