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CONFLUENCE

CONFLUENCE

So we’re told, by those who hold
The view, that earthly strings
Will overpower the pull of love
On all celestial things-
But, by some paradox, around the equinox,
No power in the stars
Could prevent the confluence
Of Mercury, Uranus and Mars.

For Mercury, of fire born-
Quicksilver, much maligned-
Uranus, so distant,
Was the last to be aligned-
Now, in Mars, this triad of stars
Has found its human face:
The pull of love, that once seemed faint,
Has drawn them to this place…

As Jupiter and Venus watched
The tiny stars at play,
And Pluto drew on love
So far away…
I found, beyond the influence
Of slabs of Hershey bars,
The meaning of this confluence
Of Mercury, Uranus and Mars...
.
.
If you'd like to hear the sung version please click on the link below:
http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=10557322

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
This song refers to a March (hence the reference to the Equinox...) many years ago, when my two siblings and I, along with our (then) young families, managed to beat the odds (and our individual hectic schedules!) to have a wonderful holiday together at our parents' place. The reference to the confluence of three planets, a celestial rarity, seemed natural. The link above is to a recording I made of the song just this afternoon... Psyve, Bahrain, 23rd April 2011
Editing stage: 

Comments

It is amazing the clockwork put in place that allows these rare alignments and the talent of a poet to put this in verse................scribbler

Thanks for reading. Glad you liked this one.
Appreciate your taking the time...
P

author comment

Very auspicious the alignment of these stars and the influence they had on your young lives!

always, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Thank you for reading and commenting. I must confess, I'm not really a believer in stars and planets being an charge of our destinies: I prefer to believe that we are the masters of our own.

The use of this metaphor was only from a poetic standpoint.

That said, this little "algnment" of the planets was very welcome and a wonderful way for us siblings to get to re-know each other...

Psyve

author comment

As i have indicated to Cat, I'm not reallly a believer in astrology. That said, I read "The prophesies of Nostradamus" with great interest....as an interesting book..... several years ago.

Thank you for reading this lyric of mine. I would be grateful to hear your suggestions for tidying this up... to understand its deficiencies as a poem, rather than the lyric it currently is.

Thank you again for reading this and taking the time to respond.

Psyve

author comment

How pale is that liquid?

Damn, HAL did you give Ian the titanium nitrate rocket fuel again?
Naughty HAL!
I'm coming in there to pull your plugs out one by one.
No hershey bars for you.
And no chess game with the sleeping astronauts tonight, either....
So there!
Lazy ...
.......Daisy...., .
.....................gimmeee...
..................................yoooour ...
..................................................aannnnssswer ...
............................................................................doooooooooooo....

P.

author comment

Ah, I understand now why the seas are referred to as the "high" seas! It's all them damned sunken galleons laden with the Indian Pale Ale.

On a more serious note, Ian, I am not sure the alternative verse version you have suggested says what I wanted to say. Thank you for taking the time, though, to try to show me a different perspective. Do apreciate it.

Meanwhile, I guess I'm going to have to live with the lyric version for a while...

author comment

friend this is beautiful. I am listening it to again. i wouldlove to have this albmu. is this on cd in america? friend your sound brings me back to bob dylan days,, you have a wonderful guitar sound and voice. i am speechless. very nice indeed. sorry about my typing not good today.
sigh..music the words of the soul and you have it. I like this music very much.. over the miles the voice is heard and the melody reaches my soul... bravo maestro friend
Bless you
mona

Thank you for your kind words of appreciation.
To answer your query, nope, no formal album or CD out, other than a few that I have burned and shared with friends and family from time to time...
You can, however, listen to some of my music on my Soundclick page from the following link:
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default.cfm?bandID=798379&content=music
Thank you again,
Psyve

author comment

Time to get that album put together and let the world know of you and your talent..what a voice.. :)

touch my soul today...such words..such sounds of wonder and so awe inspiring..You are one heck of a singer and I love the poetic words mixed in with the music. Mental scars Neopoets listen to this mans music it is unbelievable... I thank you for your gift today friend

music the language of the soul.....Mental scars sometimes they take longer to heal. this is a great song. I would love to share your gift with all whom I know for your music is very good.....that song Mental Scars should go in here too friend...

Mona
xox

Thnk you again for your kindness.
Incidentally, I did post "Mental Scars" last month. You can read the post and comments here
http://new.neopoet.com/node/3464
Psyve

author comment

Keep up this good work. I love it

Grazie
Mona

Thank you for listening and responding to this one. Glad you enjoyed this flight.... of fancy.
Psyve

author comment
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