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RELEASE ME

From the pangs of human existence
show me the path to the real paradise
if only you have seen one

Lead me away from this life so calamitous
to the cauldron of
salvation

just relieve me
if you know what
silently I mean
nay
then forget it

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
These words are directed towards the KNOW-ALLs
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

oh no...you sound a bit angry, but mostly hurt!!! send me a private message and talk it over with me. and I hope you will feel better with someone to talk to and be heard.

*many hugs, Cat

p.s.

I really liked these lines:

Lead me away from this life so calamitous
to the cauldron of
salvation

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

You take me so literally
These few words cam to my mind in my dreams
based on many of my poems
so I composed to draw one's emotions
I succeded Cats
don't you think
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxThis is last night's composed some day /////what do you say?
WAIT FOR TOMORROW
I shall return at dawn
will travel in the wings of the cool breeze
fetch tonnes of free happiness
smiles and laughters
all in store
like dates cakes
and pineapples from a store
but mine will be as fresh as thee
smile please
happiness is me
as I come
you will say
Lovely poem
are ye
happiness is me
welcome we

author comment

I was so very worried about YOU!!!

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

for your concern now this poem has two comments
'twill stay
read my comments on
NAILED
and keep it unveiled
the same way
Hope you will help
sweep the floor

author comment

This piece is emotionally charged. In life when good things are not coming forth, our good dreams, we seem to blast the adverse situation we are in.

The poetess began with a rhetorical question:

"From the pangs of human existence
show me the path to the real paradise
if only you have seen one".

A brave and well written expression. Dismal melancholy thought.

The line that touched me:
"Lead me away from this life so calamitous
to the cauldron of
salvation"

"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".

~Jackweb

This piece is emotionally charged. In life when good things are not coming forth, our good dreams, we seem to blast the adverse situation we are in. From the title of the poem, there's a call of freedom and plea!

The poetess began with a rhetorical question:

"From the pangs of human existence
show me the path to the real paradise
if only you have seen one".

A brave and well written expression. Dismal melancholy thought.

The line that touched me:
"Lead me away from this life so calamitous
to the cauldron of
salvation"

"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".

~Jackweb

Know-alls! What do they know? LoL Good work! Ya got me too!
~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

BIG LOL
thanks to you
I release ah....

author comment

yes big LOL!

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

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