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Missing You...

Hey Bro. I don't want to sound like this is a happy occasion
but I can't bring myself to be all morbid and down
when I'm thinking of you. We always tried to find the good side
of any situation that we found ourselves in.

I thought that you probably have had enough time to settle in.
I hope that your accommodations are comfy and the food is good.
What kind of car are you driving now? I'll bet that it's red!
Maybe one of those new Hellcats?

Seeing as how you are in the good place, [I can't see you anywhere else]
I thought that maybe you might have time to read this letter.
How's the fishing? Is 'Baby' there? She always did love to go fishing.
Boy, she was always ready to jump in the car, when she saw fishing poles!

Damn, there is so much I want to ask! I know that us guys on this side
aren't supposed to know what it's like, but maybe a little peek?
I don't guess that MaryAnn and grandma are hanging out with you
but you can see them now and then, right? Maybe Bobby too?

I'm glad that your suffering is over, but I miss the hell out of you!
You could maybe spare a little night-time to visit, and I would love to hear
your voice saying "Haaayyy Bro. what's up? I've been meaning to call you
but I've been having such a good time and there is so much to do..."

I promise, I'll relay any messages you send to Paulette
if you haven't been there yet. She sounds tired, I wouldn't be surprised
to hear that she has gone to see you soon. Well, if you can, give Baby a pat
for me and grandma a kiss on the cheek and someday we will get to go fishing.
Love always, Bro.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
I really would like any criticism that you have. Lew never held back, and I hope that he is reading this and giving his opinion too.
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

...critiqued? This is a very personal piece of writing. It is bittersweet. A good balance of the both and has an honest weight to it. I suppose you will get what you expect.
Cheers

Thomas

.
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...so like my lost dreams...the flood

We were friends for fifty years. We met when I was twenty-four and he was nine years and eleven months older than me. We worked a carnival as ride operators for four years and married sisters that we met on the carnival. We got divorced on the same day! We spent fifteen years living and working together at various jobs. Eventually, we moved apart as I returned to my home state of New York to care for an ailing father, but we kept in close contact and shared our lives through visits, phone calls and F.B. He couldn't have been closer to being a brother than if he were blood. Yes, it is bittersweet. ~ Geezer.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

The line "I'm glad that your suffering is over, but I miss the hell out of you!" brought a tear to my eye. I am of the view that art and in general poetry offers a window into someone's soul, even though we don't know each other personally this piece of writing made me feel like in some way I got to know you, and if that isn't a beautiful thing I don't know what is.

Sending warmest regards and love your way,

Nick.

that I could provide some details of the life we shared, with you and Triskelion, as I did above. This does make it seem as though we know each other as more than just writers on a poetry site. For you to say that you feel as though you have a personal connection with me; even before I provided details, gives me a good deal of satisfaction in the writing of this poem.
I hope that I will continue to write and make those connections with other readers. Thank you, ~ Geezer.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

I guess we all have people who are at least as close to us as a brother and sometimes even closer. It has been a bit over a year since mt hunting and fishing buddy messed up and left me here while he went on ahead on his final scout. I still can't bring myself to really write about it. I will offer no critique on your poem......i Can't

This was just the opposite for me. It seemed to flow out really easy. It started out to be a maudlin thing that I was going to write about how sad I was at his passing and the fact that our adventures together in this life were over. However, I started thinking of all the things that we had been through and the way that we had leaned on each other and joked and laughed our way through them, and it came to me, that this is another thing that we would joke and laugh about. I decided that I would write it like I would a letter to him or have a phone call about. It came easily and I will think about how great he must be doing and not how poorly I am doing. We were brothers in so many ways, because we looked at life the same way, a great big adventure, and what bigger adventure than to see what is over that last hill? ~ Gee.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment
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