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Justice Opens Her Eyes

give me your misfits your lonely your lost
give me the souls who have paid unfair cost
give me the strange ones the pushed out the odd
give them to me don't just leave them to God
give me leave to include them not exclude them please
for i've been one of these

send me the ones whose tongues say the wrong things
send me court jesters who yearn to be kings
send me the clumsy the awkward the bores
send me street urchins and falsely judged whores
send me all those who can't win though they try
for i know how to cry

i'll talk to the ones who don't understand books
i'll talk to the ones who don't have the right looks
i'll talk to those hiding their scars under skin
i'll talk to the ones still accused of some sin
i'll talk to those who holy books condemn
for u've been one of them

send me your need to berate and to beat
send me the false pride your egos eat
send me your broken and burnt golden rules
send me hate and envy - these things make you fools
send me these things to destroy for it's true
these things belong to me too

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Your sense of meter is really impeccable. Wish I could write like that….

This reminds on a Jim Croce song. Or maybe Leonard Cohen. I’ll need to reread this a few times, so much is in it.

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Raywhitakerblog.wordpress.com
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thanks. taking a stroll through memory lane, classical poetry. i grew up reading it, still love it, although i mostly now do free verse. i was thinking about the old poem made into the old song the statue of liberty song: give me your tired your poor/your huddled masses yearning to be free. i just started writing this. i was just going for rhythm. it was days before i realized most of it was iambic pentameter. thought about making all lines that, wrote it like that, did not like it. so this has some i pen some not. i think the line about give me leave . . .is off but have not come up a better way yet. suggestions welcome. thanks for reading i love cohen.

author comment

Still, such an impact when I read this.

You should publish this

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Raywhitakerblog.wordpress.com
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very few places want classical poetry or poetry with rhyme and meter. i did submit it to the classical poet's society. they rejected it.

author comment

Thanks for that. It helped me decide about submitting something. I prefer structured, rhyming work. Your poem is a fine example of that.
It says so much about the american culture on certain levels and perhaps the reason for the rejection? Did they offer an explanation?

Thomas

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...so like my lost dreams...the flood

I've found that I have to be thick-skinned about submitting.

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Raywhitakerblog.wordpress.com
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