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Evening Walk

There were diamonds on the water
and she wanted them

But these were not here
to rest in her hands

They travel with the sun
and the insistent tide

Riches she could not hold
would have to be visited again
near the shore, on the morrow

Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
You never know when and where creativity will visit. Walking with my wife today, she commented on the sun's reflection on the water - like diamonds, and how she wished she could take them home - a beautiful day to be sure!
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

This is where we learn about creativity and wealth. Riches are not always to be held, they sometimes take the form of thoughts spoken and listened to. I like this, much! ~ Geez.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thank you sir! Always appreciate your visits. I wish I could have posted the pic I took that inspired this - be well!

Cheers

Michael Anthony

author comment

A found poem worthy of print!
and the reading of.

Obi.

Thank you Obi! Glad you enjoyed this one.

Cheers
Mike

Michael Anthony

author comment

I could say more about your piece, having read this a number of times now, but Geezer's comment pretty much sums up my thoughts.

Thomas

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...so like my lost dreams...the flood

Thanks Thomas! Thoughts and input ALWAYS appreciated.

Cheers

Michael Anthony

author comment

Reminds me of many evenings on a lake's shore. Well done

Definitely was trying to capture that - thanks Scrib!

Cheers

Michael Anthony

author comment
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