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CLOUD WATCHERS
Blue eyes blink open
across tattering gray sky
to watch storm depart
Style / type:
Structured: Eastern
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
Contest:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
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Comments
scribbler
Fri, 2021-06-11 15:24
Hi Mark
Try reading just the first and third lines then tell me if it should be watching or watch. I appreciate the thought you put into this form which I only scribble out once in a while
scribbler
Fri, 2021-06-11 19:17
Hey
Enjoyable is what I aim for. So I reckon I did well. Winning a contest is secondary to sharing to me
Geezer
Sat, 2021-06-12 01:39
I see...
Lying in a hammock, staring at the sky, making rabbits out of clouds! ~ Geez.
.
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
scribbler
Sat, 2021-06-12 10:37
Yep
Watching the sky open back up as the storm clouds leave. BTW I was on the front porch yesterday talking to my nearest neighbor and we almost got run over by a deer lol