Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Twinkling Light.........{MINOR EDIT}

As they inform you
there is no light in my eyes
my Love don't ever cry

I have been so long with my love dearly
now when I sleep eternally
'twill not be a surprise

you knew all this while
day would come in inimitable style

waiting since ages
has always been some oneI have no siblings
who should have wept now none

Keep vigil over me throughout the night
recall every moment we smiled with delight

just look deep into the mirror and say
yes you loved me this lovely way

I have many times more believe me
days we lived together have gone
the sunshine had shone yet not forlorn
will still come many a memorable morn

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

demise is the sound of someone who has given up. I don't believe that you should do that just yet. You still have the strength to write. What would I do without someone like you, to harass? [Twill should not be a surprise?] I would eliminate the [should].
And you plan to go out, in inimitable style? Are you going to go out in a blast of heroism? Saving the world? What a way to go!
I would expect nothing less from my favorite egotist. Save a child from a speeding car or rescue a family of ten from a blazing house fire! All these stories are yet to be written! Write them! I'm waiting. ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thanks I also read and reread
the egotist is now sinking ///the world is shrinking ////only Gee is still linking
all others sleeping
should has gone more ideas will come //now life is normal elderly fun I love ur harassment ////it's like pepper mint
Gee thanks for the kicks

author comment

Much better! ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

prepare for triumph over sin. It seems to me this expression piece is a call to arms of sort and I am moved by the imagery you created of someone reflecting in a moment standing in front of a mirror....that private place where we can reflect physically and spiritually at the same time. You have an obvious passion and I sincerely believe that you are a soldier of goodness.
Embrace your muse. It is difficult to be heard nowadays.

Thomas

.
.

...so like my lost dreams...the flood

You have given such an accolade
to a poetic soldier
dancing in front of a mirror

In all sites my poems are read
since passed 15 years within the hour
here it took 5 days

I had to change the title
so many times till you two came on line
I bow

author comment

call it an accolade, but an observation. I can only relate to poetry in the manner for which it is intended and your piece inspired me to reply.
For your appreciation, I have posted a poem. I hope it will intrigue you and perhaps inspire you also.

Thomas

.
.

...so like my lost dreams...the flood

you are an ocean of poetry
I'm just a drop
in it

author comment

No need to remove it. I enjoy reading your poetry. You write metaphorically quite well.
Cheers

Thomas

.
.

...so like my lost dreams...the flood

I know won't remove
some day some one will say
LOVEDLY did say
lol

author comment

Hi lovedly, so many comments and I can only say what you poets are tired of...lol. Try to snip out extra words and join a few lines together. It will be a smoother read that way, methinks, my lady.

*
*
*
"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

NO one read this poem for 5 days
I had to change title only
glad it catches an eye
thanks ma'am hope ur well

author comment

Just popped in to say hello old friend, no comment to make about poem. Still trying to get back in the groove. I will explain later. Regards Roscoe...

Roscoe Llane,

Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.

as you wish hope all is well

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.