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On the Dude Ranch (a Villanelle)

Fair autumn came; oh, what a day!
Fresh breezes cool this arid land
While in the pen two fillies play.

It’s sunrise—“Giddy up,” I say.
The rooster crows to beat the band,
Fair autumn came; oh, what a day!

Now Sunday riders come— I pray,
But then bring out the granny stand,
While in the pen two fillies play.

Dudes wear tall hats, but with dismay
I note the sandals I had banned;
Fair autumn came; oh, what a day!

But, Sunday riders help me pay
Hay bills so hard to understand,
While in the pen two fillies play.

A bucked-off rider?? (Damn! I bray),
Was dragged by Nell; broke foot and hand;
Fair autumn came; oh, what a day,
While in the pen two fillies play.

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Hi VanRyan, lovely poem with excellent imagery and fun to read. You're a good pen at Villanelles (don't know why you've indicated "free verse"?
What is a granny stand?
And the riders wore sandles! Crazy, and you have to foot the bills. If the main character is you, of course.
The title, content and spacing is fine, as far as I'm concerned.
Keep safe, not sorry, Gracy

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"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

the "free-verse"was clicked on in error. It's rhymed, of course. And this is JerryK, of course---your old pal from MM. The granny stand aids the disabled and elderly riders to step into the stirrup--in other words--to climb aboard the Western saddle. Happy New Year, dear. Thanks for the comment. Val, aka JerryK.

author comment

Hi Jerry, what a surprise! I thought this had been penned by a new poet.
I understand about the "granny stand", it was also used for dainty young ladies. When I was a kid, one of the farmhands would use his clasped hands to help me on to the saddle.
Glad you're back, please keep up the fun as well as the narrative poems or whatever you wish to write. It's all wonderful.
Hope you got off to a good start in 2021. Best wishes, Gracy

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"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

there you are, [meanwhile, back at the ranch], You write so well about your exploits on the range, I wondered about the change in venue; be that as it may, you seem to have returned to the environs that you are most familiar with and consequently, most able to convey a credible story. Not that your writing ability suffered in the ensuing hiatus, it's just that I feel your authenticity showed better, here on the ranch. Welcome back. ~ Geez.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thank you for the nice comment. Yes, I decided to change my writing style just a wee bit in order to be taken more seriously (if that's at all possible), because by now I appear to be a marked man on account of my silly verses. I want to be known as as serious poet like what's his name . . . . See? There I go again-- Thank you, kind Sir. Much appreciated. Van (AKA JerryK)

author comment

in the past, written many works that I and others here have taken in a serious vein. I think that you are, indeed a serious poet and should be taken as so, no matter the subject. I do not treat fun and comedical poems with any less respect than say:
those of Shakespere or Longfellow. In fact, I would say that those who can and do write them, should be lauded for their ability to make others laugh and chuckle in this day of serious issues. We need that break and sometimes a poem should be a comedy of errors, to the serious threat to the peace and calm of our world. Thank you for your contribution. ~ Geez.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

now it is my turn to express my heartfelt thanks for your kind note in which you express such keen understanding of the self-doubt that plagues nearly every writer. Therefore, I will cease my blubbering and continue to rise on the wings of Pegasus, the Muses' winged horse, upward to our Elysium, which is--the successful completion of perhaps another perfect poem. Thanks again, good friend; your little pep-talk is very much appreciated. Van (Jerry)

author comment

well, I am a bit of a prankster, and I'm sort of tickled to have pulled your lariat, meaning--"rope" or "lasso," in case you think I'm getting obscene, but that's how we Westerners talk, lol. Seriously, with the change of my alias, I had hoped to change my style and image as a poet as well; silly me. So, now you wonder where the "van" plays into the equation? Well, I'm known as Jerry van (der) Kemp. and therefore I chose Van as my alias, but you can call me "Jerry." Now, about that granny stand or lift: I have hoisted a few (ladies) into the saddle myself, and that may well be the reason that my back is aching every day now. And can you imagine the poor, swayback horses they rode?
Okay, dear lady, take care of yourself; I have missed you. And Lynda says Hi. Jerry

author comment
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