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Borderline

A little boy sits in a prison cell
in a land across the sea
everyone knows he is innocent
but nobody sets him free.

There are children down in Africa
whose bodies know only pain
not knowing when they will eat again
or why the bad men came.

Terrorists are in every corner
of the world today
speaking of God and using their bombs
and taking good people away.

Someone is lying wounded
a victim of a war
wondering where the love is
that’s supposed to save us all.

Why does it have to be this way
does anyone really know
my faith is on the Borderline,
and doesn’t know where to go.

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage: 

Comments

Thanks Ian and no need to be sorry, I agree with a lot of what you say.
take care,
Tim

author comment

Tim, really really well done in a truly *honest* poem.

Thank you.

~Anna

Thank you very much Anna!
Tim

author comment

A very well written poem about some of the social problems around the world. The flow and rhythm are pretty good through out the piece, however at line 10 the shorter number of syllables causes a little disruption in the flow.

Other than that it's a pretty tight poem. :-)

It is such a secret place, the land of tears. ~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

Many thanks, yes I see what you mean about line 10.
take care,
Tim.

author comment

I can tell you love lyrics as this is highly singable,
if that's a word, its rhythm sung as words in our minds as we read.

And about the content it is admirable and how I agree with you,
except the very end, I am not in doubt about that.

Love from Ann.

"The image of yourself which you see in a mirror Is dead,
but the reflection of the moon on water, lives." Kenzan.

Hi, Thanks for your encouraging comment.
take care,
Tim

author comment

Anything i say will be meaningless
except that i wished to thank you
for calling me a poet
coz only a poet can recognise one
thank uuuuuuuuuuuu,
u have my heart won.

loved

you're welcome, Tim

author comment

Your poem skillfully touches the heart of everyone who wants an answer as to why so many terrible things happen and will it ever change, is the human race destined to carry on making the same brutal mistakes?

Jesus encouraged people to pray ( in the Lord's prayer ) "......thy will be done in heaven, also upon earth....."
It's hard to believe that God has a purpose or even cares about the earth, but he promises ( and he cannot lie ) that "the meek will inherit the earth" and "find exquisit delight in the abundance of peace".

In Revelation chapter 21 God had the Apostle John write about a "New heavens and new earth in which righteousness will dwell" That is His purpose for heaven and earth.

To help us put faith in that promise he told the Apostle John to add these words "Write because these words are faithful and true".

According to the Bible His promises are close at hand. Until that day we can do our best to help others and be the kind of people God approves of.

Here endeth the first and probably the last lesson. Lol

I enjoyed reading your poem and I'm sure many people will relate to it.

With Love

Mand xxxxxxxxxxxx

Thank you Mand and I'm very flattered by the interesting and thoughtful comments you have made in response to my poem.
take care,
Tim.

author comment

Unfortunately, tossing money at a problem, does not get rid of it. I don't know what the answer is, but maybe a tranqulizer- gun that only works on violent people, might do the trick. Then the people who have the answers and solutions to the problems of the world can set about fixing them without fear of the bad guys.
Anyways, Great work. ~ Geezer

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Sounds like a good idea! Many Thanks.
Tim

author comment
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