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Pull Back The Curtain...

The Windows of The Soul
Are not the eyes, it seems
They are the ears that hear
Spoken, broken-hearted dreams

Doors can be locked up
Against the breach of trust
Fling them wildly open
Do not fear an honest thrust

There is no better way
To tell of an honest man
Than to hear their words
Speak of an innocent plan

So, do not meet in darkness
Speak out in brightest day
Let your truth be known
It is the only way

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

think on it Teddy. ~ Geez.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

I fid no fault nor flaws and this poem does show your tender side just beautiful

Chrys

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Sometimes, my heart is on my sleeve. ~ Geez.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

Hello, Geezer! How are you?
Much to really like here, but for me, its simplicity is its greatest feature. All said honestly and to the point - something only an honest man may truly understand. "Speak out in brightest day..." Gives me a boost of faith just reading it.
Thank you!
L

Don't hide who you are, revel in the honesty of it! Glad to give you a boost of faith. Good to see you here and can't wait to see your latest work. ~ Geez.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

Dear Geez, lovely poem. The change Teddy suggested was the only nit I had. It's perfect, great one for the competition. I especially like the opening strophe and the last one. The end rhymes, spacing and theme are all to my liking and cheered me up on this Mother's Day in Argentina.
It wasn't exactly a cheerful day for me, but that's a long story and I'm glad I've read your poem and feel a lot better.
Enjoyed, Gracy

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"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

happy Mother's Day. Yes, I know that it is not a particularly happy day for you, but maybe if you think of it as having had the chance to bring a beautiful soul into this world... So glad that I could help you feel a little better by writing this; just trying to do my part. Be well, ~ Geez.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

I would be disappointed in you, if you did not give me your honest opinion. i will definitely look this one over and take your criticisms into account. ~ Geez.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

I am surprised that you haven't noticed that there are elipses
after everyone of my titles. It is just a little idiosyncrisy of mine.
Something that I started a long while back and just have kept up;
kind of like a trademark.

The windows of the soul
Are not the eyes, it seems
They are the ears that hear
The broken-hearted dreams

A door can be locked up
Against a breach of trust
Fling it wildly open
Fear not, an earnest thrust

Do not meet in darkness
Speak up in honest ways
And let your truth be known
It is the only way
.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

I made some more changes. ~Geez.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment
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