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Solitary moments

See the lonely cabin
nestled in the woods
there by the swollen stream

Natures hand touches all
and scents the air with memory
but the cabin waits for the touch of a human hand

The glow of a fire
in the crisp night air
where is the dog curled up in the front
dreaming of it's next hunt

Sounds are missing
the laughter of lovers
ringing clear

The aroma of hot chocolate and fresh baked bread
yest there is hope
that it will live again

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
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Comments

an argument could be made that a cabin built in a wood serves both the purposes of allowing a family to be close to nature while also offering shelter from it. I like that your poem shows this cabin as having a human bias instead of necessarily mediating between nature and man. This has reminded me of Howl's Moving Castle, where Calcifer (a fire demon who possesses Howl's heart) keeps his castle "alive"
enjoyed!

raffy

for seeing it as it was written I appreciate that

Chrys

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author comment

Hi, Chrys,
After reading a few times, I realized, for me, it was not an onlooker but, the house actually having a solitary moment - as if it is contemplating and waiting for that human touch. Stirring thought.
Thank you!
L

perhaps the cabin is a metaphor lol give that one some thought
but yes I gave it a human quality

Chrys

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author comment

the influence of several other works in this. I was delighted at the way they were blended together to create a "living" cabin.
This is the way that a "poet" works, they take the world around them and meld it into their own. Nice. ~ Gee.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
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Thank you so much for those words other works ? we will have to discuss this sometime I guess I did this unknowingly

Chrys

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author comment

it was unknowingly. Sometimes, I do it knowingly, but many times, I find elements of others work that have inspired me without knowing. Nothing wrong with letting another influence you, as long as it isn't plagarism. Still nice work. ~ Gee.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

awwww thank you my friend

Chrys

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author comment

Chrys, could feel the sense of solitude in a well crafted poem...may be the cabin personifies it ..

liked it...

raj (sublime_ocean)

thanks for the kind words my friend

Chrys

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author comment

thanks for the encouragement your kind words bring

Chrys

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author comment
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