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Faery Grotto

FAERY GROTTO

We wade nude under waterfalls,
frolic in grottos, beneath canopies
of ferns, rest on lichen-smoothed rocks.
Timorous splashing,
skies veiled by mist,
June opalescence.

Spirits float in caverns,
we have goose-pimples on our thighs,
jungle lianas conceal
our love-making.

Whispers call
where only elves dare tread
and trim boulders with silky moss.
We climb out,
our lips bitten red, laughing.
Soft rain, tropical clouds
on southeast breeze,
black sand beaches.

Scamper into jeans,
grab rucksack
flung carelessly in glades’ recesses.

Barefoot, we dash on rutted road
to our campsite.
By the flapping tent-hole
we lie easy, listen
to dripping leaves.

Hours have been mislaid
in our humdrum lives,
poetry of our bodies linger
in memories of plunging shallows,
our day at the falls.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
I wrote this poem long ago, for a contest at Mosaic Musings. I believe it won an H.M.
Editing stage: 

Comments

Language use is excellent and the theme is one that seems to be very popular during this upcoming Spring season.
The rhythm of it is smooth enough that it makes it seem like it rhymes. Very nice from beginning to end. No wonder it got a H.M. ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thank you, Gee. So glad you like it. We're going into winter, a long one this time around, so thoughts of Spring make me feel better, but remotely so. Here the water is icy because the lakes and brooks are from melting glaciers. Tx again.

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"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

author comment

I pictured every word of your poem. So full of imagery. Nicely done

Chrys

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Thank you, lynn. I finally got the imagery OK, after much work on it. xxx

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"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

author comment

Yes, the lip balm...lol. I apologize for not thanking you all before this. I simply forgot I'd posted it here. One of the love birds is already in Heaven. Only the memories remain, but that's as it should be.
So glad you like it. Tx a lot for you kind comments.

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"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

author comment

I'm glad about your smiling at these old memories. A shame about the pics. I don't have any at all of this occasion, but it's true that dozens of others are of no use now. I'm told they can be renewed by some experts, but I suppose it's expensive,.
The lakes, waterfalls and streams are icy here because they are formed by melting glaciers. It's always been that way, tho' Antarctica is melting rapidly. Disaster would follow. Better not think about it.
I apologize for thanking you after so long, Mark. Your comments are uplifting.

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"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

author comment

Imagery I can ponder indefinitely. Thanks for the slow smooth ride.

Glad you had a smooth ride, Happy! And that the imagery mades you ponder. Sorry for taking so long to answer. xxx

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"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

author comment

Thank you, Alan. I'm delighted that you enjoyed my poem. Again, sorry about taking so long to acknowledge your comment. Had some troubles and forgot I'd posted it here.
All the best!

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"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

author comment
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