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Winter's Plight Is Spring's Delight (February Contest)

Storms beat like a restless drum
Forcing leaves on fragile stems
To bend and send our feathered friends
to fear the worst when gales impend,
to reel, deal a force of steel.
which hurls, its whirls a frigid feel.

Its harsh, unforgiving bite
The final stance of winter's plight.
Before it’s sudden bid adieu,
Spring leaps in to spell anew.

Its spritely enigmatic charm
A tender touch
Can do no harm.

Beguiling nature to its grace,
Its fruitful loving warm embrace.
Whilst colours bloom
A wondrous sight
As nature basks in spring's delight.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Last few words: 
I have tried to write something for the Spring contest. I apologise in advance for any sloppiness and thank you for taking time to read it LG
Editing stage: 

Comments

Hi LittleGift, your poem is so colorful as well as musical. I see little to crit, just maybe some punctuation. I think it should be "spring's" as well as "winter's plight". In L2 I would remove the comma after bend. Also after friends.
In S2, L2 you don't need "and", I think. Also no comma after charm, in L4. It seems to me you don't need a comma after "sight". Otherwise, this poem is a winner, so deftly crafted and spot on the topic of early Spring. Congrats!

Gracy

Gracy, thank you so much for helping me. I think I managed to edit it as you said. Thanks for the support and kind words. I feel I have much to learn but I am loving it

Many thanks
LG

author comment

LG. Title is good but perhaps winter's and spring's would be good.
Language is good and certainly descriptive (stanza 2, L.1 its instead of it's - we all do it sometimes))
Rhythm, pattern and spacing might just need a little polish. Stanza 1, L 2. & 4. could be a little too long for the remainder of the poem but nought needs to be lost so:-

Storms beat like a restless drum
Forcing leaves on fragile stems
To bend and send our feathered friends
to fear the worst when gales impend,
to reel and deal a force of steel.

The theme, Spring, is always an appealing subject to write about. Many will enjoy this piece ~ The girl done good.

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Critique is a compliment
Kind regards, Alan
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Yay thank you Alan, I will work on those fixes shortly. Thanks for reading and the helpful advise. Always appreciated

Kindest regards

LG :)

author comment

to stop by and let you know that this is really good! I see that you have all the critique you need, so I'm not going to offer any more. Nice stuff! ~ Geezer.
.

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Thank you for being so nice and leaving me such lovely feedback. Will edit it shortly. Many thanks for reading it for me

Kind regards

LG

author comment

the only suggestion I might make is there are to many "ands" in this write other than that it was delightful to read

Chrys

Many ands make light work!

.......................................
Critique is a compliment
Kind regards, Alan
.......................................

Hello, so I edited, making the changes advised. I attempted to remove the ands. I ended up with just one and in the piece. I hope I have done things right. Please feel free to let me know if I haven't

Kind regards and thanks so much

LG

author comment

Thanks so much for the help. I am going to work on improving it. It's been great getting constructive feedback

Kind regards

LG

author comment

Thanks so much for the help. I am going to work on improving it. It's been great getting constructive feedback

Kind regards

LG

author comment
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