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PRAYER

You know me and who I am
You are aware of all
All that I want
All that I have ever needed
My birth is known
My death has time
To your powers all belongs

So long I've been on this part
Too long I'm carrying my Cross
Very young I've been on the race
The journey of life isn't for teenagers
Though I have embarked on it long ago
Pending on when my helper comes
Up to you my heart channels
May I see the best end of my journey
This I only wish.

Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
My conversation with God about my triers and tribulations and all that I have been facing in the journey of life.
Editing stage: 

Comments

lovely but I feel as I intruded on you most private thoughts
one correction would embarked( past tense) work better in this spot

Chrys

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for your observation i will do that.

author comment
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