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All Alone Prima Poetry stage 2

alone in the darkness
thick forest
on an empty trail...

A cabin overgrown
a little girl
this grassy town...

beyond the prairie
open field
Darkness falls...

a path through the trees
dark blue skies
light came forth
the end of the grassy road...

a light brighter than day
opened the way
to leave the woods...

into the expanse
the cosmos
from whence I came...

Editing stage: 
Workshop: 

Comments

made me feel as though I were alongside you watching the night turn to day! Geezer.
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glad for the invitation..to do something knew and fun

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka. All Neopoets welcome to join the Collaborative Poetry Writing Workshop.
https://pixiblogs.blacpixi.com/

author comment

glad for the invitation..to do something knew and fun

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka. All Neopoets welcome to join the Collaborative Poetry Writing Workshop.
https://pixiblogs.blacpixi.com/

author comment

i can see you alongside me watching in my minds eye..

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka. All Neopoets welcome to join the Collaborative Poetry Writing Workshop.
https://pixiblogs.blacpixi.com/

author comment

You've successfully used the trance as a tool.

cheers,
Jess, Neopoet Directors
Neopoet is a workshop. Poets take the time to read and think about your work and offer suggestions.
There is no obligation to make any changes however please acknowledge critique and comments.

I have read both parts, these two could be expanded
Take the thoughts and walk with them to another level, Yours as always Ian xx

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Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
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Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

I’ll see I’m sure I could

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka. All Neopoets welcome to join the Collaborative Poetry Writing Workshop.
https://pixiblogs.blacpixi.com/

author comment
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