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Ode To The Dudes That Made The Roads (April Contest)

On land that once
Was rightly famed
For forests lush
And fields untamed
Lakes or mountains
Or swamps unnamed
Nature bursting
Unrestrained

There came some men
To blaze a trail
With key to open
The jungly jail
Over hill and
Down the vale
They forged a path
With frame unfrail

So we can get
From here to there
The house’s stoop
To market square
We’re not like birds
Through open air
But ground starts covered
With snag and snare

So whether you travel
The road that’s high
Or the one
Less traveled by
We owe so much
To those vanguard guys
Who gave us every
Hello and goodbye

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
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Comments

I think it would amaze folks just how many heavily travelled roads were once just blaze marked paths. I like the rhyme and rhythm as well as message. P.S. If this is meant for contest you need to put (April contest) next to title

I like this Ode To The Road kind of thing. Yes, what do you think that our ancestors would think of us rocketing along at 60 mph? They would laugh and say we are crazy to want to travel that fast! "You'll lose your breath and die!" [I heard that someone said that back in the day]! ~ Geezer.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

The going too fast to breath thing was said with the advent of railroads. Indeed the were "proofs" that if a human went faster than 18 mph they would not be able to breath............

I made the title AND the poem plural. That's actually one of the things that bothered me about the poem when I was writing it. Thanks for the read! Good luck in the contest :)

author comment

yeah, you don't have to change your title. do what you think works best. I appreciate the exchange :)

author comment
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