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Deja vue...

There, there it is again
A place in time, I'd touched before
Where, where in when, I'd been again?
I reached for it, trying to touch once more

Just out of my grasp, the feeling swayed
None else it could have been
The thought, indeed that it was played
But, I didn't know it then.

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
Editing stage: 

Comments

This reads just like a dream or a dreamy feeling.
I especially liked this line:
"Just out of my grasp, the feeling swayed"

I always wonder why do poets choose a french title for an English piece. Just saying.
Thank you for sharing

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

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I was trying to describe the feeling of Deja vue ! I don't know that there is another word for, or words that describe the situation. I will think upon the idea and mayhap come up with a new title in English. ~ Geezer.
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author comment

thank you for explaining

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

Follow me
www.instgram.com/rularules1

means the same in all languages

Psychology
the feeling that one has had an experience previously, although it is actually new to one
2.
a feeling that one has been in a place or had a specific experience before

so your poetry is abs unique
Deja vue(ish)
great Gee

for your comment and praise of my poem. ~ Geezer.
.

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author comment

good theme in this short write...
............................................................

raj (sublime_ocean)

raj, glad you like it! ~ Geezer.
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author comment

the tone, feel, reach... that tantalising untouchability of the sensation.
You've caught it perfectly.
I couldn't resist a little reading, I hope my Aussie accent doesn't harm it.
https://soundcloud.com/neopoet/deja-vue-by-guy-geezer-caswell-1

May I post this gem to our Facebook page?

cheers,
Jess
Neopoet is a workshop. Poets take the time to read and think about your work and offer suggestions.
There is no obligation to make any changes however please acknowledge critique and comments.

Actually, you are way too kind. I merely managed to get what I was feeling into the script. Your accent is just right for this. Gave me a bit of a chill hearing it in that Aussie/British tone. It so much reminded me of "A Clockwork Orange" or perhaps a scene from "The Wall" I like the echoing sound of the whole thing. Yes, yes, post it, if you will! ~ Gee.
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But glad you like the reading, interesting comparisons. As in America Aussie has several different accents. From broad Aussie through city to countrified and bourgeois, I guess mine is the latter.
Posted on Facebook.

cheers,
Jess
Neopoet is a workshop. Poets take the time to read and think about your work and offer suggestions.
There is no obligation to make any changes however please acknowledge critique and comments.

laugh out loud on that one! Yes, you can be a ... well, you know. But, thank you for the praise anyhow. ~ Gee.
.

Please acknowledge critique and comments.
They are a vital part of our community!
Critique or comment today!

author comment
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