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The Conundrum of the Empty Cube
We are like
Cardboard boxes
That can fold
In upon themselves
A million times
We are bodies
Made up of
60 percent
Water
(Almost
80 percent
In our brains)
We are like
The solar system —
Mostly empty
Space
This should comfort
And consternate us
All of that
Room
For God knows
What
Sometimes
We are the most
Supported
By that
Which is the most
Maleable
Contained in that
Which is
Practically
Limitless
You can always
Grow more
Multiply higher
Divide further
Fall farther
In love
Review Request (Intensity):
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage:
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Comments
IRiz
Wed, 2018-06-06 23:58
I like the striking image in
I like the striking image in the opening stanza
IRiz