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To The Dreamers

You say you have a vision
but you treat life like a fiction,
imagining trophies in your grasp
when your life is loaded with crap.

The car's engine is running
but no motivation to start moving
and then you complain
when you don't make the change.

If you live only in dreamland,
then you embrace denial,
how can you rise like a man
and see your own potential?

I refuse to say it's wrong to dream
but surely you must know
dreams will never be real
if action is just a no-show.

Muhammad Khalid bin Zainul
Singapore

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 

Comments

I is a dreamer but my dreams are of a reality beyond the strife we see each day.
There in a future tortured by truth the dreamers dream came true.
Man loved his fellow man, and strived to correct all the wrongs ever done, without judging.
Go well within your own dreams and know that there is a reality we seek, that in our now can only be a dream..
As usual your write is clear and excellent, I would never correct your works now as we have walked many moments in several Nows.
Yours as always Ian..

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Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

Good to see you here.

author comment

I thought that we could have talked more about the dreamers, here you have mixed reality with something we try to understand, but always seem to just nod at,
Talk later, Yours Ian..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

Good to see you back and posting your poems...

Regards...

raj (sublime_ocean)

thanks for the read. I'm trying to balance my poetry writing both in English and Malay.

Alid

author comment

Your premise is spot on. Without action dreams become.........nothing. Yet a poet who dreams then acts upon their dreams by putting them in verse is a gem.......stan

Thanks for the visit, the read and the comment.

Alid

author comment
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