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Some Words On Being Homeless

Submitted by Lonnie on Tue, 2018-01-02 09:08

Some Words On Being Homeless

Dempsey dumpster diving done
lunch is now complete
time once more to join my peers
who wander on the street

I chat a bit with Lady Jane
who leans upon her cart
she’s every bit of 83
God Bless her lonely heart

the Mitchell kids, Elaine and Mike,
are resting in the shade
waiting for their mom and dad
to bring them lemonade

preacher John is speaking to
a group of passerby
He shares The Sermon On The Mount
an old man starts to cry

Joe the Wino staggers past
a bottle in his hand
trying hard to make it last
though few would understand

My fellow Veteran, Dan McFee,
is selling little flags
hoping to recoup enough
to wash his faded rags

all in all a pleasant day
with little going down
which is quite a miracle
within this part of town

I only hope that I will find
a quiet place to sleep
safe enough to not be robbed
of what I choose to keep

C. Lon R. Bruso

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
reminiscing on my time being homeless in San Diego
Editing stage: 
Not actively editing

Comments

Eumolpus

Tue, 2018-01-02 21:02

Eumolpus's picture

sounds like you right in the poem, and if it's not you've done a good job convincing me otherwise.
As far as craft it's very well done, great first line and stanza, and has the rawness of Guthrie and Carl Sandburg who wrote a lot about the homeless.
Whatever goals you might have in writing this poem, you have succeeded. We know so much about you from the little photographs you show.
There are so many magazines in every large city about the homeless. Send it to them I bet they'll publish it there!

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

Lonnie

Tue, 2018-01-02 21:14

i was indeed homeless for over eight years out in San Diego, California. I wasn't actually on "THe Street" but lived in the back of an old Dodge van. I did come to know and make friends with many street people though, and they were all worthy of my friendship!

author comment

Geezer

Mon, 2018-01-22 09:04

Geezer's picture
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I have missed so many of your poems lately. I echo the thoughts of Eumolpus and say that this is really good work. Thank you for sharing your experiences and bringing some of these folks to life. ~ Gee.
.

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