Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Aroma

Submitted by T. Harmonee on Thu, 2017-12-28 15:23

I could smell the stench
Of our relations sticking to me.
Clenching my skin like a garbage truck
Gripping the morning trash.
But no matter how much I would scrub,
I was never fully cleaned.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
Old relationships can really leave some stains behind.
Editing stage: 
Editing - draft

Comments

Sparrow

Fri, 2017-12-29 05:02

Sparrow's picture
Volunteer badge

A grand piece aching for a few more lines.
Sometimes we have to stretch to fell all the muscles and as with poetry a little stretching can make another world more exciting.
Take care and keep writing, Yours Ian..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.