Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Spirit World

The Library.

There coming into view
the great library of learning
the inside walls moved
with rainbow fire burning

There rows of books all glowing
these are filled with forever
Try, I heard, in mind flowing
to feel or see their knowing

think a book that you would read
It can only be of past or now deeds
All books are here to choose
Old stories and past written news

The future though written,
Is not to be, for us to see
I thought for a while
Of what book would I read.

There out of the rows
they came at rainbow speed
as I knew the books to be
the words just smothered me.

Arcing from the shelf they came
so peaceful to my mind
the words spoke to me there inside
one sentence at a time.

How long would each book take to read
as at home it would be a while?
The library told me the story
so fast, before I could even smile.

My friend this is the place to be
As the words became a part of me
That is so, the thought came clear,
That’s the way we all read here.

This is not a read, I tried to say,
But thought it as that was the way.
I have lessons to learn my friend
this think talk will now have to end.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
A talk and walk with Spirit as you do!..
Editing stage: 

Comments

to let you know that you have written about one of my favorite places on earth! The library. I believe that I have mentioned in my profile, that I have had a library card since I was twelve years old. Someone asked me one time what the worst thing that could happen to me would be. My reply was that I might lose the sight in my other eye and not ever be able to read again. It's the truth! Among the other sights that I would miss, is the pages of a book. Well said, my friend. ~ Gee.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

This is where my Children friends go to read or what we would call reading.
Just remember that when in the spirit world the library is a bit different to the ones we go to as the reading here shows.
The children showed me many things so that I could understand and write of their world, never worry your eyes will be perfect again, but have to work out a few things if it's that the books flow into your mind at a very high speed.
Take care and many thanks for your visit, Hope that you are all well, if not just ask for healing..
Yours as always, Ian ..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

author comment

UR just 75
and can compose from

Entry to Exit
which LIBRARY
Ian
I am half blind and fully deafy
o man

I had both my eyes zapped in the last few years and now can see without glasses, but as I am long sighted I can see a gnat crap at 100 yards but just need a little magnification for close reading, my ears are not so good at 3000 Hz but all the rest are ok, but as my wife has a problem since her operation I don't want to magnify sound at all lol'
This is as I have said to Gee a couple of bits from the talks with the Children as they told me of many things.
You take care out there, and I send you much healing.
Lovely to hear from you on one of my writes.
Love to you as always,
Yours Ian..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

author comment

my one eye compensates for the cataract blindness
half only of the other
it is like a 16 years old kid
who can at 1000 yards decipher his lovely gals lovely lips

the ears are moody
they hear at times only
when some one asks for money
they become SILENT
and
when someone asks
can I serve red wine
my ears BLUSH
smileS
my voice does beckon
do you reckon

There is something deeply attractive and colorful in the images you have created.
Your poems invite to your world.
I am grateful for it.

Comment about the form. It is a personal opinion but it looks like you started with a freer form than ended. I like when poem is consistent in style. Two ways to go, either revisit and structure the beginning or relax your perfect rhymes at the end. But of course you are the boss, I am just a reader who know lives in your burning library. Best wishes,

IRiz

Thank you for your great comments, I have taken out the second bit of the write as you say it seems from a different place.
These writes are from the tapes and I have adapted them from just talk or think look, to a visit by Grandad to the children's world.
So I go along with your thoughts and made the write simpler, I hope this is better as I have many to write up the Granddad is me and the children show me around so I have to return home at the end.
This is much better written as a story line than as poetry but some I just write as poems a habit of mine,
Take care and thanks again, Yours Ian.. xx

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

author comment

Ian, I hope you did not lose the second part.
It was good on its own.
Good luck with your grandchildren project.

IRiz

Thanks for your support,
The second part, is stored as all my writing,
I have a few thousand pieces and never throw away anything especially writing, I still have my exercise book from 1957 just the cover is missing lol.
I have to date transposed one quarter of one tape to a story or poetry form out of 125 Audio tapes.
If you have time have a look at:- yenti.co.uk there you will find Sadie's Diaries and a few other stories apart from most of my poetry, I am not very tidy where keeping things is concerned, one day maybe I will tidy the whole thing up.
Thanks again for your assist, take care and go well,
Yours Ian .. xx

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

author comment

Dear Ian,
I will visit your site.
I anticipate to find a great pleasure in reading your prose.
Have you thought to try to restore some of your texts by memory? As if you Write it de novo? It helps me to cristalize the content and lose irrelevant or less important. I found personally that it is easy to drown good lines, that sometimes they need help to draw attention of a reader. Sincerely, Irene.

IRiz

Sorry I have been a little lax in writing the last few weeks.
I am sorry to say that I cannot remember any, and that means none of all the things I write.
I wonder why I write, then it comes to me, that I write for others, they read a piece, and it means something to them, then that task is completed.
As I journey on this plain I meet, and can talk to many poets or people along the way.
If they read my words just one piece that is all I ask.
I can only remember one poem ever, and that is, "Home thoughts From abroad", I learnt it at school when I was about nine and of course as you have to a few passages from the Bible.
Some of the Biblical words stayed in my ways, but the Poem seemed to hold me more than anything since.
I feel emotions and react to them a lot with tears, and just do as I think is right.
I use to write for people as I have said, and still have copies of those pieces, I wrote a piece for my Sister the other day and it turned out as if she wrote it.
Here it is I hope you will like it:-

A Thought from Hazel

I am out there amongst you all.
Wandering in your beautiful memories.
To each of you, this holds so dear.
A good light that shone for you all,
That still shines, and yes, it is brighter

To my Alf who has been my twin spirit
In thoughts and so many good ways.
My children, Granddaughter, and all children
I was a Mother, Sister, Nan and Aunty,
Friend to more than I dare say.

“You can all see me now” I hear
“Yes we will all fly free one day”
I will wait for you as I am unchanged.
Held in memories arms unchanging
I will watch you as you grow

There in a moment of now I am.
To you as always Alf, the same
A weakness of body, but not spirit.
Held in love for ever, as all I know.
I will always walk with you.

There in the warm sun, you will feel me
In the breeze, I will whisper your name.
I will touch you all in memories way.
A look, a feeling, know when I am near
Take care of you all, as you are precious.

There in the great way of all things,
Know that I am but a thought away.

Love to you all, as I love you all.

Irene, you see I am oldish now, and to remember these writes, is too much for this fading brain, just to be able to write what I see, and feel, is a gift from some place, I always see an old Monk sat at his desk with a quill pen writing, maybe I should blame him but he is OK..
He says that you should begin to trust again and then life will be a blessing and give you time to write more yourself..
Take care little lady and it is great to walk with the young ones..
Yours as always Ian..xx

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

author comment

Dear Ian,
I love the poem about your sister.
She is just a thought away, in all the little things unexplainable to a stranger but clearly remembered by you, the small things that connected you throughout your lives are now your memories. Write on, my friend.

IRiz

Libraries are too rapidly becoming a thing of silicone instead of paper. As if computers never crash and power never fails. I like the use of rhyme within free verse as it succeeds in high lighting some portions of this poe. There are a few changes I thought about suggesting but none would make this better....just different. BUT you might want to reconsider some of the punctuation placements......stan

Just another look into the children's world.
Here in the UK now there are many libraries that are run by local people on a voluntary basis as the damn government has taken away the funding for so many of them.
I have many books here and love them all, many National Geo Mags, I even gave away around 400 Nat Geo's to a local School but I keep all that are in binders and the ones before 1960.
I have taken away the second part as it was only my return home and was different to the visit to the Library.
Take care my friend,
Yours, As always, Ian ..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

author comment

where is the time
to go to any library

I have only young
gals and guys seen
visiting corners for silent kissing
pretending
to be reading folded books
lips blushing
eyes day time like stars twinkling
they smiled at me

twas tickling like ole times since!!!!!

This is the Library that the Spirit Children go to, to learn about things or just for fun.
They have schools over there and are tutored by the elders, they have parades when they all have fun and they carry flags of colours for the level they are at.
Another world in there some place or where ever it is.
Take care young Bard and know we think of you,
Yours Ian, and the Children xx
PS:- the kisses are from the children lol..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

author comment

Continue to bask
in your lovely imagery
why delve in misery

there is nothing beyond what is here
the distant horizon
but live in hopes to have children in heaven
all is your own imagination

This young bard
says no more
than what one ought to know

Life is here only
all else is just
illusive and imaginary
time pass if you will

Who am I to in you knowledge instill
'tis thy own will

No basking or pretence here I have 200 hours of talking to whoever that gave me the stories and information so what do I do with them.
Is there an empty life that believes in nothing after time, ???
Yours Ian..
PS:- if I had your addy I would send you a tape and let you decide.. Or I may put a few words from them onto that voice thing that Jess uses..

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

author comment

keep counting STONES
some day hope you won't break with them
our soft calcium
BONES

did u read my
KIDS poetry
Ian

(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.