Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
warning
.
time flies
like an arrow
fruit flies
like things sweet.
smoking clogs
your arteries
and may well burn
your feet..
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
User login
Author information
Other recent work
Active Workshops & Contests
Contest
Workshop
- Splash Pool: How to use imagery in poetry..
- Wading Pool: Neopoet How To Video Resources
- Olympic Pool: Earn A Poem Workshop 2
- Olympic Pool: Earn A Poem Workshop 1
- Plunge Pool: Stream Workshop
Comments
Eumolpus
Mon, 2017-10-23 20:21
and....
keep going. For me it's a few very good catchy pencil lines as you are starting a sketch, but the finished drawing is far still off.
Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings
Gunnar Hedlund
Fri, 2017-11-03 09:12
thank you emu soup fifty cryptic good singer...
my apologies
but it is as is
and needs know
nothing
apologies
no not know
author commentswamp-witch
Mon, 2017-10-23 21:29
Hey Gunnar,
I think I agree with Eumolpus, would love to see this developed into something more. You've got our attention, keep going! Develop that warning into something we may not have thought of before.
Kelsey
Critique, don't comment.
Community guidelines: https://www.neopoet.com/community-guidelines
To see our learning resources, click the "Curated Resources" link under the Resources tab in the top menu bar.
Gunnar Hedlund
Fri, 2017-11-03 10:03
But more is less, so they say....
...so be content with what you have,
it's all we know.
Thank you intently,
Gunnar.
author commentGeezer
Tue, 2017-10-24 10:15
In total...
agreement. Let's have a bit more!
~ Geezer.
.
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
Gunnar Hedlund
Fri, 2017-11-03 11:09
mor? that's three-quarters. is that enou? (that's two-thirds)
or did you mean something more than
as opposed to a bit more?
no mind, but thank you Geezer.
Gunnar
author commentGunnar Hedlund
Sun, 2017-11-26 13:05
apologies to the above reviewers...
...there are times when i feel like a weird elf
snapping at your heels
because i can.
g
author commentGunnar Hedlund
Sun, 2017-11-26 14:06
simply,
smoking clogs may well burn your feet
if you happen upon wearing them
at the time of their combustion.
sorry, i didn't mean to set the world alight.
where's mr crud, when you need him?
author comment