Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

on the field (october contest)

He was beautiful to see
abs bulging
star struck was I
as he pulled this wagon
a red wagon full of hearts
mine I left bare and naked
like soil filled with humus

On the field that day
we tilled the soil of our hearts
planting seeds of love
having no care
even the sky was cognizant
as she cried with joy for us

Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage: 

Comments

you win again
nice hearty poem
ah red wagon

you may please revisit
the contest limitations
and expectations

I like this a lot. I like the title, the theme and the rhythm.
It left me with some good visuals. Good luck in the contest. ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Let the best man win

author comment

S K I P
ME

Can you guess

Very much...*grin*

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.